alaspooryorick

I bought my sister a pair of opal earrings last night. The cute jewelry store saleswoman asked what they were for and I told her my sister's birthday. She asked how old my sister was, and I told her 36 (ok, don't tell my sister I told y'all that). She's like, "is that your only sibling"? I said no, that I have a brother who is 43, and she interrupted to ask how old I am. I said 37, and she said I didn't look that old.

The payoff for being a greasy Italian is eternally youthful skin. So there, fuckers.

I actually have 2 sisters, btw. They're twins. One I am estranged from. Recently, she's been making overtures at reconciliation. Shit. I guess I should be receptive to them. I'm always critical of the rest of my family for being so mule-headed in such matters.

Oh, the cute saleswoman had rings on "that" finger. They didn't look like "normal" engagement/wedding rings, but they were on "that" finger, so I said "thank you" and left. 'Sides, I'm holding out for a cute chick full of holes and/or ink.

We got some heavy winds here over the weekend which removed a few shingles from my roof. That was $175 I'd have rather not spent. New houses suck. They give some redneck a hammer, and he thinks he can build a house. *shakes fist* If I'm ever dumb enough to buy a new house again, I'm gonna hire me some Amish fuckers to build it. Then I'll prob'ly have to hire some other dudes to add 'lectric lights to it, but wtf.

Seriously, as soon as I can afford to get this house in sellin' shape, I'm gonna unload it and move to a friggin' condo or something ITP.

later, bitches.

*** P.S. ***
See the contrasty pink thing over there <---? That means I'm friggin' available. Line forms to the right. No shoving, please. Pictures of my big toe and knee are in one of my pics folders.

*** P.P.S. ***
I wish I had a goat. I would trade it for your sister.