akuma_usagi

So my gramma came and took my cat today but in return gave me a flat of Pepsi and some bamboo.

And I am worried by who they speak about me having my gramma look after my cat. Like I hate cats and never want him again. All I can think about is the christmas when I was thirteen, I came home and my dog was gone. The reason my gramma insisted I never fed her cause whenever she came over she would fed her and she ate like she was starving. Have I ever mention that I can't stand old people logic?

Like today for example, she does her christmas shopping at Costco. Well wouldn't that be the logical place to buy clothes? I mean isn't it the first place you think of?

Anyhow, I am still pissed off. I cry now at the drop of a hat. I keep thinking the fur collar on my coat is my cat. And some noises sound like my cats.

I keep thinking about how I hate christmas parties. I hate being rejected all the time. So yes my plan is avoidance, which is so much easier with a job. But I figure if I am not there by my own choice, well then I quit I am not fired. Or something like that.

But today was Christmas tree day and I can't wake Jarrod up to help me. Sometimes it hurts so much inside I can't be alone. I shouldn't be alone.

It seems that whenever I watch tv someone is commiting suicide. Fun fact, the real reason I don't drive, I have a strong desire to veer into oncoming traffic. Even if I am not feeling the slightest bit blue. Just a crazy compulsive desire. I have all kinds of them. Too many to list because I am gonna go play Diablo and forget about the real world.

And because funny 'normal people' ask to see pics of my idea of christmas trees. I posted a pic. Yep.

Mmmmm, happy thing. Jarrod took me to swiss chalet, if I promised not to cry in the restraunt. And then he even bought me a sundae. Kay, what I ate today was my happiest day moment...