akrasia

I hadn't worn that watch in almost 2 years, since it was given to me by my mother after my fathers funeral. I'm not sure why I wore it on wednesday night but as I was speeding in a car towards limerick city calling an ambulance for my youngest brother who had just slit his wrists and taken an overdose, all i could think about was the watch. My fathers watch. The watch he died wearing, i think there is still some of his blood in a crevice of the bracelet from where he cut his hand as he fell to the floor when the pills took their fatal effect.
The watch was incidental it did not cause my brother to attempt to take his own life, but the symbolism was overwhelming. When I was sitting in the hospital with my brother, high from the vodka, painkillers and adrenaline, he kept talking about how he finally had empathy with our father.

He's at home now, there is no permenent damage to his body. His family are trying to ease the troubles in his mind, It will be his 18th birthday in just over a week. I hope to throw him a 21st in 3 years time.