Lately I've been feeling really down. I think it's the closest thing I've ever come to real depression. I have no drive to do anything, I can't stand looking at myself, and in general I feel lonely and worthless. I can't recall a time in my life ever feeling this bad, so it was good to go out with David last night and have a friends ear. I met Dave at his apartment and we went out to get him some dinner. I pretty much unloaded all my problems on him during the drive to Magnolia. Aside from a general feeling of uselessness, I've been re-considering whether my ex-girlfriend and I were too hasty when we broke up. I know that more than anything this is my loneliness talking, and that I shouldn't jump back into that's comfortable just because I can't stand to be alone right now, but Christ it is difficult.
So we went to Magnolia and after I got done enumerating my problems, Dave got to revel in stories of his triumphs. It seems that he's got a sexy new woman whose a animal in bed, and Dave had is getting more and better lovin than at any time in his life. Lucky bastard. I've met the girl, and she's sweet and bright and funny, so while I feel jealous, I'm still happy for him. He pretty much caught the brass ring as far as women are concerned.
So we went to Magnolia and after I got done enumerating my problems, Dave got to revel in stories of his triumphs. It seems that he's got a sexy new woman whose a animal in bed, and Dave had is getting more and better lovin than at any time in his life. Lucky bastard. I've met the girl, and she's sweet and bright and funny, so while I feel jealous, I'm still happy for him. He pretty much caught the brass ring as far as women are concerned.
kinkerbelle:
smile. keep your head up. *hugs*
smile. keep your head up. *hugs* 
luxdivon:
i had the worst luck in love for the last 4 years. only lately has it improved. sometimes it just takes a long dry drought to know yourself. to have it be something that's 'not just because you're lonely' but because you think you'll make each other's lives more enjoyable. even though life would still be enjoyable alone. as far as the depression. i know it sounds stupid. but take vitamin c and b12. like 1000mg. it helps. it does for me at least. and as far as another person's lover. it might seem peachy now. but she might leave. it might just be the great first couple of months that everyone has. everyone eventaully has to deal with reality. and reality is never as peachy as it might seem. so as to say. you're no luckier than him. and he you. it's all the same. you just dont see it yet. and you're still pretty young at 21. so yea. keep your chin up. 