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akasnuggles

Peoria

Member Since 2004

Followers 9 Following 10

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Wednesday Jun 08, 2005

Jun 8, 2005
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First off, i gotta say that the truck is a fucking monster. I was tippin' 100 coming back into town biggrin
Motherfucker.
I might need to upgrade...

Secondly, i just realized that people in love piss me off. i went to 5 random journals, 3 of which had really lovey, relationship heavy posts.
I'm sure this is something i've been annoyed with before, but it's really bugging me right now.
I dont think i was ever like that, gushy about love and such. I dont think i was, i hope i wasnt. I hope i never was.
I dont think i ever was.
I'm an emotional masochist, i think. I was told that once. I think i was told that, maybe i thought i was one and am just saying i was told i was as to make it seem more true.
Because you arent what you say you are, usually.
And you hate in others what you hate most about yourself.

(next bit's kinda long... i've always wanted to say that...)

I'm impressed with the tolerance she brandishes
If it was me, I would snapped from the sheer over anxiousness


The following journal entry was written in an hour during work. Ill now spend the next 2 hours typing it up.

It came to my attention today that Im the only white person working where I work.
Atleast, on the crew that I work with.
I say it came to my attention, but, really, it was brought to my attention by Jerry. He asked me if it felt weird being the only white person there.
I said, I dunno. I guess not. Havent really thought about it.
Which I havent. But I did think about it, and No, I dont really feel weird about it. It really doesnt bother me.
It does kinda show where the industry stands, though, when the majority of the workers are single, black mothers.
Its hard to ignore class struggle when its right in yr face. People, I guess, dont notice.
So, of the crew, Im the only white person, and one of only three males. Im also one of four people my age (AJs 19, Michelles 20, Cynthias 25).
Of the males, we carry the lab floors (Jerry and I, respectively) and handle throwing the big trash and recycling (AJ).
There has never been a guy working the bathrooms, never a girl throwing trash.
Hmm.
Samuel didnt come face-to-face with a black person till he was 20-21. He grew up in Pekin. Hes spent his life in Pekin. He first lived in rural Pekin before moving directly to the heart of Cracker-Town.
Segregations been abolished, you say. Interesting.
Growing up in Pekin, I was lucky enough to have been exposed to different cultures VIA trips to visit my grandmother (who still lives on the south side), as well as a rather multi-culti family background.
Not that Im saying that Peoria is the cultural epicenter of Illinois, Im just saying my exposure to varying cultures wasnt limited to MTV and movies.
When Sammy initially told me he hadnt ever been around so many black people, let alone TALKED to them, I just nodded.
And Gueys never had a face-to-face encounter with an actual Asian person, yet hes the authority on Asian Culture.
The only Middle Eastern person Davids ever met was the Indian dude that works at Dunkin Donuts/Clark (he thinks its the same guy), yet he still feels obliged to call him/them towel-heads.
How quaint.
And Sammy thinks hes gangsta with his fake-assed Blackcent.
Ok, so Im not the most PC person in the world, but Im not fucking Matt Hale, either.
Much to my mothers dismay, I still say Black instead of African American.
This is due to the fact that every time Ive said African American to a black person, they look at me like Im a fucking tool.
I sound like Im trying to prove something, my tolerance, my color blindness, whatever, but Im not. This is simply the fifth time race has been brought up to me within the last week.
Honestly, I havent thought seriously about race in a long time (Im thinking since 89ish).
Its not that I dont recognize race, the differences between cultures and such, its just that, alotta times, race plays a very small part as a deciding factor in anything.
Race is an easy identifier.
Jerry is an older, thin, black man.
Steev is an older, large, white guy.
Bert is a middle-aged, thin, light-skinned, black woman.
So on, and so forth. Race, age, buildthese things are short-cuts to larger personal descriptions.
I notice things that black folks do that white folks dontI notice things Latin folks do that Asian folks dont, that Indian folks do that African folk dont.
I just have a tendency not to generalize either way.
I recently read a comment in another persons journal where a person said something like Mexicans are some of the nicest, most hardworking people theyd ever met.
This person, apparently, is a Mexican expert.
At first I thought that it was a dig on the popular Lazy Mexican stereotype. I thought, Thats cute, hes playing offa that one thing cute.
But, the more I thought about it, the more I was afraid he was being serious. That he honestly believed that all Mexicans are nice, hard-working individuals.
Now, I know that sounds like a dig, but its not.
Im just curious as to how he came upon this conclusion. This generalization.
I wanna know the ratio of mean Mexicans to nice Mexicans.
If were talking ratios, am I to assume that the encounters Ive had with white folks are indicative of the entire race? If so, white folks is evilhands down, Ive had more shite encounters with white folk than nice encounters. It could be the fact that I KNOW more white folk than not, but well pretend thats not a part of the generalization.
With black people, I find it around 50/50.
Gays? Id say its 70/30, nice.
Latino? 60/40.
Asian? Overwhelmingly nice.
Of course, this is dismissing cultural differences and such. Im judging it on a White Scale, where etiquette, tact, manners, and vocal tone plays a part.
Community standards, other than my own, are moot.
Whats that? No, my association to all these races have been mostly in passing, but I believe Im an even-headed, objective personI think I can make these assumptions safely and without incident.
But lets do the sexes as well, since were doing generalizations:
Woman are more polite than guys, but Ive had closer bonds with males how should I rate this?
Should I divide it into ages? That would make it easier
But, of course, I havent met every person, have I? How am I supposed to make an accurate assumption without proper data?
Oh. Thats right. I fucking cant.
I wanna know if he meant Latinos in general, or specifically Mexicans.
If, by chance, it was Mexican-specific, Im curious if hes working up race-specific profiles of Cubans, Puerto Ricans, etc. etc. etc.
Because alotta white folks cant tell the difference between Puerto Rican, Mexican, and Cuban. To alotta people the accents dont even help.
David still uses his Cuban accent when hes talking about getting drunk on tequila.
So, did ol dude go into his local Latin community and interview everyone, initially asking whether or not the person was, in fact, Mexican? Did he dismiss bi-racial Mexicans? If so, is there a separate conclusion for that?
What about upbringing, what part did that play?
From there Id imagine hed launch into a number of psychologically tested questions to determine ones work ethic and whether or not theyre personable.
But I find it more likely when he said, Mexicans he was talking specifically about the five or so Mexicans he goes to college with, occasionally drinking with a couple of the guys/gals.
Maybe.
I could be wrong.
Maybe the questionnaire that he used covered all bases; Generation aspects, tradition aspects, upbringing, location, etc.
Im just saying generalizations are evil, ineffectual bullshitgood or bad.
Judge people on an individual, but culturally sensitive, basis, for fucksake. Elsewise its rather counterproductive.
Its my current policy to not generalize.
Atleast not generally.

Boop.


PS
Theres a lil voice in the back of my head that keeps saying that this particular rant is ill advised and that I should have shelved it.
So, if I happened to offend anyone, my apologies, but its all in good fun.
Off to watch Band Of Brothers again. 9 hours of fun, that is.
figmentation:
well... why not? and are you sure you want to be???
Jun 8, 2005
phoolsfire:
well. as a structualist, i'd ave to say that first, "your white privialge allows you to not think about race". and as a person of color, i'd have to say its insightful that you recognize the generalizations that minorities face all the time, and you need to actively work to erase race and gender. as a person...i'm like whoa dude, that some heavy shit, wink

i called my friend in michigan, and trips off frown
i can't get her to fucking realize she needs to leave a bad situation. and if i go up to get her, it would just be a repeat of what happened last time.

i arranged to have my midterm taken today, so no need to worry about missing class smile

i got all weekend free if you wanna hook-up
Jun 9, 2005

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