I know i'm not the only one who feels this way, but... i wanna beat the shit out of Hilary Duff.
And you know what?
I think i can prolly take her...
What came first, the music or the misery? People worry about kids playing with guns, or watching violent videos, that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss. Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?
Yay, good weekend all around. Best, i'd say, since the Resident Evil 4 weekend.
Oh, the joy of staying up two days with a good friend then heading off to work for the sole purpose of sleep.
But that was a few months ago, and i've been dry in neutral weekends since.
I wouldnt say this was the best weekend ever, but just better than the shit i've been having.
With a string of neutral weekends like that, it's good to get a decent to put me back in the red.
Vodka + Sour Apple Laffy Taffy =
Unfortunately it also means i'm not keeping a alcohol/non-alcohol ratio.
Chasing an adult beverage with a child's candythere's a pederast joke in there somewhere...
I'm drinking more, but i still consider myself a lightweight. I'd still rather sit and sip Zimas and pussy-ass wine coolers than hit a beer every minute.
And i'm peculiar, i guess, because when i drink, i drink to *shock-shock* get drunk.
To this, i'm hitting the hard-stuff and never going over my limit.
I've only passed out once: (stop me if you've heard this one) It was three years ago, on my birthday, i was going thru some shit and my friends (heh-heh) decided to liquor me up in an effort to open me up (i'm a notoriously private person...er... really, at least to my closest friends). Halfway thru the nite, i go into macho fuckit mode and switch from whiskey to rum. I'm not only drinking straight here, i'm swimming in the fucking bottle. Around 130am, i'm tossed. I vomit once in the bathroom (doorway, i never made it to the toilet... that was a fun cleanup...), once in the garbage can in the corner of my room, and once out on my back porch (thank god for the backdoor in my bedroom, i'd have never made it out of the room). I then passed out on my bed.
To this day i cant smell Bacardi without nearly retching. ( See I like to party not drink Bacardi 'Cause I'm not looking to throw up on nobody Thank you, Mike D)
I've thrown-up a few times since then, more because of eggs than with alcohol.
It's that whole drunk, five-am, head to Hardees, grab some breakfast thing. Drunk, i think i can handle eggs.
Sobre, i know better.
So, last nite i'm chasing vodka with Sour Apple Laffy Taffys, watching WoderBoys and just plain chillin', when i realize that it's 530am and i need to be up by noon as to head off to work.
Now i'm worried cos i havent been keeping my alcohol ratio balanced with my non-alcohol drinks.
You know, as to avoid a hangover.
A bottle of water and half a can of A&W's finest, and i've gotta piss.
I get back from pissing, i lay down to crash and... well... i fall asleep about two hours later and wake up with only a mild hangover.
This solo drinking mission was to be a duet, but i couldnt tear Sammy away from his hectic Final Fantasy XI Online schedule.
His words, not mine.
Maybe next time, eh?
I must say, the best times i have with people are the times we're bored. When there's nothing to do, you know, besides hang out and talk.
Maybe drink.
I can never recall the crazy late night conversations, but they must be magical, seeing as they fill my heart with suck warmth.
I cant say this about many people, in fact i refrain from saying it about anyone, but Samuel is my comrade, and i truly do love the dorky lil bastard.
Here's another one of those weird sex things that i'm gonna be obsessed with til it's (personally) resolved: Impotence.
That word makes me cringe, and though it doesnt fully apply to me or my situation, i'm gonna use it anyway.
I'm impotent.
Or, whacking-off just using my noodle doesnt worki needs me sum porn.
This is something i touched on last entry (heh touched...er), and will continue to touch on until i get over it.
Between pissing (see drinking story above) and actually falling asleep, i decided to masturbate. I had something going, a thought/situation, but my mind started drifting to something else, something really stupid. And before i know it, i'm barely hard still.
This fucks me off, and it's not the first time it's happened.
Last night, i was working for what felt like an hour (really, it was 21 minutes, but who's keeping track?), and nothing. I finally had to stop cos my fucking forearm was cramping up.
I was swimming like a motherfucker and barely staying afloat, if you know what i mean.
This is further complicated by the fact that it's coming up on the year anniversary since i last got laid.
Since my last sexual experience (positive or otherwise).
So i'm reduced to imagining the same ol sexual situations over and over and over.
I mean, one can only imagine the same sex stuff so many times before it gets boringeven imagining an ever changing roster of chicks is getting tiresome.
At one point i imagined the first time i whacked it, that got me no where...
I dont wanna sound pervy or anything, but i figure, at some point, i'll get so bloody horny i'll be able to get off to a rerun of Mama's Family.
A rerun of Mama's Family in my head, tweaked slightly so that Naomi gets naked and we fuck... or maybe Bubba, he was kinda cuok, that's a bit too gay for me...
...
...
Maybe Naomi and Bubba and Me?
Fuckit, Iola and Mama!
What i'm saying is, sooner or later, i'll be able to just use my imagination.
And seeing as though i'm letting it all hang out, as it were, i think vodka gives me gas...
Rebuild the robots with bigger tits and little fists
Coolest... Guy... Ever...
And you know what?
I think i can prolly take her...
What came first, the music or the misery? People worry about kids playing with guns, or watching violent videos, that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss. Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?
Yay, good weekend all around. Best, i'd say, since the Resident Evil 4 weekend.
Oh, the joy of staying up two days with a good friend then heading off to work for the sole purpose of sleep.
But that was a few months ago, and i've been dry in neutral weekends since.
I wouldnt say this was the best weekend ever, but just better than the shit i've been having.
With a string of neutral weekends like that, it's good to get a decent to put me back in the red.
Vodka + Sour Apple Laffy Taffy =
Unfortunately it also means i'm not keeping a alcohol/non-alcohol ratio.
Chasing an adult beverage with a child's candythere's a pederast joke in there somewhere...
I'm drinking more, but i still consider myself a lightweight. I'd still rather sit and sip Zimas and pussy-ass wine coolers than hit a beer every minute.
And i'm peculiar, i guess, because when i drink, i drink to *shock-shock* get drunk.
To this, i'm hitting the hard-stuff and never going over my limit.
I've only passed out once: (stop me if you've heard this one) It was three years ago, on my birthday, i was going thru some shit and my friends (heh-heh) decided to liquor me up in an effort to open me up (i'm a notoriously private person...er... really, at least to my closest friends). Halfway thru the nite, i go into macho fuckit mode and switch from whiskey to rum. I'm not only drinking straight here, i'm swimming in the fucking bottle. Around 130am, i'm tossed. I vomit once in the bathroom (doorway, i never made it to the toilet... that was a fun cleanup...), once in the garbage can in the corner of my room, and once out on my back porch (thank god for the backdoor in my bedroom, i'd have never made it out of the room). I then passed out on my bed.
To this day i cant smell Bacardi without nearly retching. ( See I like to party not drink Bacardi 'Cause I'm not looking to throw up on nobody Thank you, Mike D)
I've thrown-up a few times since then, more because of eggs than with alcohol.
It's that whole drunk, five-am, head to Hardees, grab some breakfast thing. Drunk, i think i can handle eggs.
Sobre, i know better.
So, last nite i'm chasing vodka with Sour Apple Laffy Taffys, watching WoderBoys and just plain chillin', when i realize that it's 530am and i need to be up by noon as to head off to work.
Now i'm worried cos i havent been keeping my alcohol ratio balanced with my non-alcohol drinks.
You know, as to avoid a hangover.
A bottle of water and half a can of A&W's finest, and i've gotta piss.
I get back from pissing, i lay down to crash and... well... i fall asleep about two hours later and wake up with only a mild hangover.
This solo drinking mission was to be a duet, but i couldnt tear Sammy away from his hectic Final Fantasy XI Online schedule.
His words, not mine.
Maybe next time, eh?
I must say, the best times i have with people are the times we're bored. When there's nothing to do, you know, besides hang out and talk.
Maybe drink.
I can never recall the crazy late night conversations, but they must be magical, seeing as they fill my heart with suck warmth.
I cant say this about many people, in fact i refrain from saying it about anyone, but Samuel is my comrade, and i truly do love the dorky lil bastard.
Here's another one of those weird sex things that i'm gonna be obsessed with til it's (personally) resolved: Impotence.
That word makes me cringe, and though it doesnt fully apply to me or my situation, i'm gonna use it anyway.
I'm impotent.
Or, whacking-off just using my noodle doesnt worki needs me sum porn.
This is something i touched on last entry (heh touched...er), and will continue to touch on until i get over it.
Between pissing (see drinking story above) and actually falling asleep, i decided to masturbate. I had something going, a thought/situation, but my mind started drifting to something else, something really stupid. And before i know it, i'm barely hard still.
This fucks me off, and it's not the first time it's happened.
Last night, i was working for what felt like an hour (really, it was 21 minutes, but who's keeping track?), and nothing. I finally had to stop cos my fucking forearm was cramping up.
I was swimming like a motherfucker and barely staying afloat, if you know what i mean.
This is further complicated by the fact that it's coming up on the year anniversary since i last got laid.
Since my last sexual experience (positive or otherwise).
So i'm reduced to imagining the same ol sexual situations over and over and over.
I mean, one can only imagine the same sex stuff so many times before it gets boringeven imagining an ever changing roster of chicks is getting tiresome.
At one point i imagined the first time i whacked it, that got me no where...
I dont wanna sound pervy or anything, but i figure, at some point, i'll get so bloody horny i'll be able to get off to a rerun of Mama's Family.
A rerun of Mama's Family in my head, tweaked slightly so that Naomi gets naked and we fuck... or maybe Bubba, he was kinda cuok, that's a bit too gay for me...
...
...
Maybe Naomi and Bubba and Me?
Fuckit, Iola and Mama!
What i'm saying is, sooner or later, i'll be able to just use my imagination.
And seeing as though i'm letting it all hang out, as it were, i think vodka gives me gas...
Rebuild the robots with bigger tits and little fists
Coolest... Guy... Ever...
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
23...that's when the hangovers start to become taxing. The near-fatal ones kick in around 28.
In addition, the book was no where near as well written as fight club. The philiosophy behind the culture of Gor isn't directly said and because of that you gotta use your brain more.
In regards to the lack of a hardon you were babbleing about, go for a real woman and not an image of one and it might change.
(why havn't you engaged in any sexual activity for a year)