I had a strange encounter with Dr. Webber today. Rick Webber is the type of guy that he once asked that we clean off his books.
He's also a big lush.
And a pilot.
Who wanted to be an astronaut.
Your mother's an astronaut.
My mother's too dumb to be an astronaut.
Because when i hear astronaut i think of White Men Can't Jump.
...
...Astronaut.
When i get into work today The Boss says to me, he says, Take that box of soap up to the office, would'ja? I think whatever, say ok, and grab the box and head for the stairs. The box in question is a big box filled with tiny individual little boxes of soapyou know, for soap dispensers.
All together. The box weighed around 25LBs. For the sake of the story*, let's say the box weighed 50LBs, yes?
And it's 10 flights of stairs, not 2.
So i lug the 50 pound box o' soap up ten flights of stairs. At the top, standing at the elevatorcup of coffee in handis Dr. WebberDick to his friends.
Dick and i have maybe exchanged courtesies maybe 3 times in my five years of employmentmaybe. When i see him i give him the nod.
He launches into how cold it is, how cold it's gotten, how cold it's gonna be. I'm taken off guardthe tone of his voice was likeHey, buddy, where ya been?!
Well, that and because i'm a smoker who's not terribly in shape and i'd just carried 75 pounds of soap up a dozen flights of stairs.
I give him the blow-offI hear it's supposed to be warmer tomorrowand head for the doors so as to sit the soap in the office.
No diceDick goes on.
Yeah, it was getting pretty cold when i went to lunch.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, got a trim before lunch, you knowa haircut.
...mmm.
(elevator doors open, Dick gets in)
I should have went to lunch first, though, because the girl...
and he just kept talking to me as the door closed and he disappeared. It was fucked. Dude only comes in when he needs to fill out a grant application or give a lecture.
And when he does come in, he has to take an extra long lunch because some cunt cant cut hair worth a damn.
What's the world coming to, you know? Why is it always the best of us that suffer the most?
...Dick.
*and my masculinity.
He's also a big lush.
And a pilot.
Who wanted to be an astronaut.
Your mother's an astronaut.
My mother's too dumb to be an astronaut.
Because when i hear astronaut i think of White Men Can't Jump.
...
...Astronaut.
When i get into work today The Boss says to me, he says, Take that box of soap up to the office, would'ja? I think whatever, say ok, and grab the box and head for the stairs. The box in question is a big box filled with tiny individual little boxes of soapyou know, for soap dispensers.
All together. The box weighed around 25LBs. For the sake of the story*, let's say the box weighed 50LBs, yes?
And it's 10 flights of stairs, not 2.
So i lug the 50 pound box o' soap up ten flights of stairs. At the top, standing at the elevatorcup of coffee in handis Dr. WebberDick to his friends.
Dick and i have maybe exchanged courtesies maybe 3 times in my five years of employmentmaybe. When i see him i give him the nod.
He launches into how cold it is, how cold it's gotten, how cold it's gonna be. I'm taken off guardthe tone of his voice was likeHey, buddy, where ya been?!
Well, that and because i'm a smoker who's not terribly in shape and i'd just carried 75 pounds of soap up a dozen flights of stairs.
I give him the blow-offI hear it's supposed to be warmer tomorrowand head for the doors so as to sit the soap in the office.
No diceDick goes on.
Yeah, it was getting pretty cold when i went to lunch.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, got a trim before lunch, you knowa haircut.
...mmm.
(elevator doors open, Dick gets in)
I should have went to lunch first, though, because the girl...
and he just kept talking to me as the door closed and he disappeared. It was fucked. Dude only comes in when he needs to fill out a grant application or give a lecture.
And when he does come in, he has to take an extra long lunch because some cunt cant cut hair worth a damn.
What's the world coming to, you know? Why is it always the best of us that suffer the most?
...Dick.
*and my masculinity.