akasha823

I haven't done this in a while, but here is a poem......

It is about codependence. Gosh, I was young, 14 when I wrote this. So glad I grew up!!!
______
Down and Out
April 2, 1991

Im down and out when youre not around.
Listening all night, I cant hear a sound.
I only feel the beating of my heart.
Sorrow is the pit of my destruction.
Or is it the pit of my emotion?

All I want is to die in your arms,
But you wont let me,
You wont hold me,
Pain is all I know.

Down and out,
I cant let go.
Avoiding the pain,
Which I cannot show.
I want you to be here.
Wishing I could be here with you for eternity,
Knowing that it can never be.
Down and out.

What is this pain inside of me
When I see you reach for me?
You hurt me, I still want you.
Leaving me to die on my own,
I still love you.

Yet you still think its funny,
To see me,
Down and Out.
___________________

I think I was foreshadowing to my last serious relationship. The one with JackAss (not his real name, though it should be and not an SG person either). It has been over 2 years since I left him and I could kick myself for staying with him past the point of being unhappy. But then I have to look at it this way, I probably would not have met some of the cool people here on SG if I had left him sooner.

Can I just say that LiPsOfDeCeiT rocks?!! Thanks for taking me to see poopiepants05!
He rocks and the bands were awesome!

Kisses!
Tamara