Sometimes I don't even know why I bother.

Why do you call me every night after work to talk for hours and to wish me goodnight?

I can feel how you feel about me.

I can't believe how scared you are to be attracted to a girl who isn't trash.

All to say you're too "damaged" for relationships right now.

I know it's nothing personal, i'll believe you when you say you truly need to be alone right now, despite how sad it makes you because you have plans for your life that can't be put on hold any longer.

I would never get in the way of your best interest.

The one girl you're attracted to that isn't a complete fucking psycho and actually cares to HAVE your well-being in mind.

I'll bet if I was some insane bitch on wheels you'd drop everything for me. Silly, silly man you are. You'd let your plans fly out the window.... well I truly hope not this time, not for me, or any other girl.

I guess that means you aren't the Great Reliever.

I guess I need to get over being all butthurt over this.

If you aren't the Great Reliever, then he is still being forged and I'm OK with that, as long as he's still coming for me.

It is clear to me, it has been made clear to me that you are hurt and you need good connections and good friends. I will do that for you, as it is in your best interest. I do trust you have mine at heart as well.

This doesn't stop me from feeling incredibly lonely, and disappointed.

Meanwhile I will wait for the Great Reliever, and in between those days i'll live my life to the fullest as best as I can and trust that the Universe has good things in store for me.

I really needed to get this off my chest.