Was it obvious I was feeling especially awkward around human beings on Friday?
I do occasionally. I would've prefered to have stayed at home, sulking and being intense, but apparently I was in danger of becoming an urban legend. ("Who? Paul? Yeah, a friend of mine saw him once, but it was dark. They caught a glimpse of him through some trees. it must have been him, he was wearing white trainers...")
It was however good to see everyone, and to talk shit about hip hop, tattoos, racialist weirdoes and their sick sad fucked up little lives, and The Mystery Conversation that I had with Ben. I don't remember what was said, but I remember it being full to the brim with a cavalcade of transgression.
I think it involved hunting Metrosexuals on horse back, with dogs, and council estate children riding pigs and acting as mutant picadors, in the manner of bullfights.
Then we went to the Renegade Burlesque thingy, which I was so not up for. Watching people dance in their skivvies is SO not me, for a variety of reasons, bue everyone else was going and I didn't want to be an antisocial bastard. I am though, obviously, but it's important to maintain my carefully crafted web of lies.
I'm sure the girls were very lovely and pretty, and probably smelt of daisies and nutmeg, but the crowd were a gang of bent spine slack jawed nu-metal rejects, drooling like zombies at a glimpse of skin, and I resented having to mix with them, and got the righteous misanthropy as a result.
I sort of missed the dancing as a result, as I was too busy taking the piss out of the crowd. Oops. Still, everyone else was smiling, yay!
And now to end with a list.
Things I want:
Belly Rub.
New profile picture - I'm getting tired of looking at my nipples. That and, y'know, it makes me look like a self centered egotistical twat with a narcissitic streak a mile wide. Which I am, but it's impoartant to maintain my web of lies.
Peanut butter on toast (crunchy, mind)
Samurai Armour.
Pet Hyena - I would call him Sandy.
Feathers instead of hair. Think about it, it's a bitching concept.
What kind of feathers would you replace your haircut with?
I do occasionally. I would've prefered to have stayed at home, sulking and being intense, but apparently I was in danger of becoming an urban legend. ("Who? Paul? Yeah, a friend of mine saw him once, but it was dark. They caught a glimpse of him through some trees. it must have been him, he was wearing white trainers...")
It was however good to see everyone, and to talk shit about hip hop, tattoos, racialist weirdoes and their sick sad fucked up little lives, and The Mystery Conversation that I had with Ben. I don't remember what was said, but I remember it being full to the brim with a cavalcade of transgression.
I think it involved hunting Metrosexuals on horse back, with dogs, and council estate children riding pigs and acting as mutant picadors, in the manner of bullfights.
Then we went to the Renegade Burlesque thingy, which I was so not up for. Watching people dance in their skivvies is SO not me, for a variety of reasons, bue everyone else was going and I didn't want to be an antisocial bastard. I am though, obviously, but it's important to maintain my carefully crafted web of lies.
I'm sure the girls were very lovely and pretty, and probably smelt of daisies and nutmeg, but the crowd were a gang of bent spine slack jawed nu-metal rejects, drooling like zombies at a glimpse of skin, and I resented having to mix with them, and got the righteous misanthropy as a result.
I sort of missed the dancing as a result, as I was too busy taking the piss out of the crowd. Oops. Still, everyone else was smiling, yay!
And now to end with a list.
Things I want:
Belly Rub.
New profile picture - I'm getting tired of looking at my nipples. That and, y'know, it makes me look like a self centered egotistical twat with a narcissitic streak a mile wide. Which I am, but it's impoartant to maintain my web of lies.
Peanut butter on toast (crunchy, mind)
Samurai Armour.
Pet Hyena - I would call him Sandy.
Feathers instead of hair. Think about it, it's a bitching concept.
What kind of feathers would you replace your haircut with?
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
But illness wants to steal all my fun.