agata

In my life, ive been whitness to more people my age being buried or cremated than any other.

It doesnt seem right does it? Ive yet to know someone who's died of just plain old age.
Obviously these things happen, its just that disspite coming close to being 6 feet under myself, I never really got out of the whole child mentality of death. I dont think its necessarily a bad thing, its not like im emotionally stunted when it comes to these situations. But I have to admit, I wasnt really expecting there to be an open casket at the funeral, I dont think many people were really.

Its not like I havent seen a dead body before, Ive even seen doctors try in vain to revive my best mate, but the feeling you get when putting a flower on you're dead friends chest is hard to describe. For just that split second, nothing really made any sense. I wasnt sad, I wasnt happy, I didnt even feel like I was really there, it was all abit confusing.

Since the funeral Ive had a really irratic sleep pattern. Its like narcolepsy, I keep waking up at odd times, in odd places. Last night I woke a 4am after having a strange dream where something happened to my friend Beckie. I cant even remember what happened, but it was so vivid at the time I didnt completely catch on that I was dreaming. Im not sure she completly apprechiated me waking her up at some unearthly hour to make sure she was ok.

Anyway, not really alot else to mention other than im missing Beth and dont bother going to see Nacho Libre!