It has to be said, at the moment Im looking astonishingly white trash. 
Im crashed out on my bed watching Nightmare on Elm Street 2, in a check shirt, aviator shades and odd socks, eating pop tarts, drinking Stella and Jim Beam (no, not together) out of the bottle and chocking away on a pack of Luckies.
Ill rewind a bit
Well the majority weeks been pretty boring. Work's shit, but at least there were no dead people, so its up from last week... Yay!
Last night, was, to quote the Crankies; "fan dabby dozy!"
After a booze run and some drive-by vandalism to the tunes of Motorhead, Huey Lewis and the News and Wu Tang Clan. I polished off a bottle of black vodka out of a saucepan, smoked some fine green then we all fecked off into town.
This is where it all begins to get a little blurry. The only thing I can remember about the whole walk to pub was talking to my friend Karl about Nonstopdancer's cracking Hendrix tattoo. Other than that, there are only little odds and sods I can recall.
I know at one point I went to the bar and asked for "...your least gay bottle of wine... oh, and a pint glass!"
I saw a few guys I used to go to school with.
I danced to Norma Jean.
And when we got back I watched a Neurosis live dvd and smoked enough weed to not feel feelings.
The night was only slightly marred by one of my ex's younger brother who cant hold his liquor trying to square up to me. But this wasnt without its comedy moments. Such as his girlfriend coming up balling her eyes out and blubbering "Please dont kill him! Please don't kill him!"
I woke up face down on Ryan's couch at about 10 this morning and decided to go and wander around town... still drunk...
For future reference, its not a wise move to stroll around a city centre, on a Saturday, just before Xmas, with a raging hangover.
Not having the energy to partake in mass homicide, I spent the time buying crap and thinking of ingenius and creative ways to 'take out' as many annoying shoppers as I possibly could.
After a few hours aimlessly staggering round in circles it became apparent to me that I had bought a great deal of stuff... Some of which I have no/very vague recollection of.
I find these funky little bad boys though...
... I know what you're thinking, and yes, I did get the left one too! And no, I dont have and clothes they'ld 'go' with!.
Other than that, Ive had a less than productive day. Watching all of the Naked Gun Trilogy, sleeping, smoking and the occasional masturbating. Still, Im happy, and thats all that matters, and as Ive just seen an advert for a new comedy series staring Jason Lee, I shall now go to sleep a quite content lil' bunny.
Night night you crazy kids.
Addition: I nabbed this from Mneylu
Step 1: Get your ipod's playlist together, put it on random, and play.
Step 2: Post the first line from the first 20 songs that play.
Step 3: Let everyone guess what song (and artist!) the lines come from.
Step 4: Cross out the songs when someone guesses correctly...
1) The gold roads sure a long road, winds on through the hills for fifteen days...
2) Just plug me in like I was Eddie Harris, Im eating crazy cheese like you would think im from Paris...
3) The power of love is a curious thing...
4) What we're dealing with here is a total lack of respect for the law...
5) I will be here when you are gone cus' I have arrived to a power gauge...
6) Last night my little dancer came dancing to my door...
7) I dont know what you're looking for, you havent found it baby thats for sure...
8) My war, you're one of them...
9) Get down, get down (repeat x8), ahhhhhhhhhhhhh...
10) The smoke stack spitting black soot into the sunny sky...
11) Im a street walkin' cheetah with heart full of naplam...
12) Wanna tell you a story about a woman I know...
13) With a long range weapon or suicide bomber, a wicked mind is a weapon of mass destruction...
14) You jump in front of my car when you know all the time that 90 miles an hour, girl, is the speed I drive...
15) Good morning Vietnam, haha...
16) Been driving all night, my hands wet on the wheel...
17) I want your soul, I will eat your soul (repeat)...
18) Im born, Im alive, I breathe and in a moment or two I realise that the sphere on which I reside is asleep on its feet...
19) I gotta lotta respect for the rich and the bored...
20) Well he's not necessarily trying to say that he minds it but someone plays evil tricks on that kid...
(the ones in bold are the one's someones guessed already!)
Im crashed out on my bed watching Nightmare on Elm Street 2, in a check shirt, aviator shades and odd socks, eating pop tarts, drinking Stella and Jim Beam (no, not together) out of the bottle and chocking away on a pack of Luckies.
Ill rewind a bit
Well the majority weeks been pretty boring. Work's shit, but at least there were no dead people, so its up from last week... Yay!
Last night, was, to quote the Crankies; "fan dabby dozy!"
After a booze run and some drive-by vandalism to the tunes of Motorhead, Huey Lewis and the News and Wu Tang Clan. I polished off a bottle of black vodka out of a saucepan, smoked some fine green then we all fecked off into town.
This is where it all begins to get a little blurry. The only thing I can remember about the whole walk to pub was talking to my friend Karl about Nonstopdancer's cracking Hendrix tattoo. Other than that, there are only little odds and sods I can recall.
I know at one point I went to the bar and asked for "...your least gay bottle of wine... oh, and a pint glass!"
I saw a few guys I used to go to school with.
I danced to Norma Jean.
And when we got back I watched a Neurosis live dvd and smoked enough weed to not feel feelings.
The night was only slightly marred by one of my ex's younger brother who cant hold his liquor trying to square up to me. But this wasnt without its comedy moments. Such as his girlfriend coming up balling her eyes out and blubbering "Please dont kill him! Please don't kill him!"
I woke up face down on Ryan's couch at about 10 this morning and decided to go and wander around town... still drunk...
For future reference, its not a wise move to stroll around a city centre, on a Saturday, just before Xmas, with a raging hangover.
Not having the energy to partake in mass homicide, I spent the time buying crap and thinking of ingenius and creative ways to 'take out' as many annoying shoppers as I possibly could.
After a few hours aimlessly staggering round in circles it became apparent to me that I had bought a great deal of stuff... Some of which I have no/very vague recollection of.
I find these funky little bad boys though...
... I know what you're thinking, and yes, I did get the left one too! And no, I dont have and clothes they'ld 'go' with!.
Other than that, Ive had a less than productive day. Watching all of the Naked Gun Trilogy, sleeping, smoking and the occasional masturbating.
Still, Im happy, and thats all that matters, and as Ive just seen an advert for a new comedy series staring Jason Lee, I shall now go to sleep a quite content lil' bunny.
Night night you crazy kids.
Addition: I nabbed this from Mneylu
Step 1: Get your ipod's playlist together, put it on random, and play.
Step 2: Post the first line from the first 20 songs that play.
Step 3: Let everyone guess what song (and artist!) the lines come from.
Step 4: Cross out the songs when someone guesses correctly...
1) The gold roads sure a long road, winds on through the hills for fifteen days...
2) Just plug me in like I was Eddie Harris, Im eating crazy cheese like you would think im from Paris...
3) The power of love is a curious thing...
4) What we're dealing with here is a total lack of respect for the law...
5) I will be here when you are gone cus' I have arrived to a power gauge...
6) Last night my little dancer came dancing to my door...
7) I dont know what you're looking for, you havent found it baby thats for sure...
8) My war, you're one of them...
9) Get down, get down (repeat x8), ahhhhhhhhhhhhh...
10) The smoke stack spitting black soot into the sunny sky...
11) Im a street walkin' cheetah with heart full of naplam...
12) Wanna tell you a story about a woman I know...
13) With a long range weapon or suicide bomber, a wicked mind is a weapon of mass destruction...
14) You jump in front of my car when you know all the time that 90 miles an hour, girl, is the speed I drive...
15) Good morning Vietnam, haha...
16) Been driving all night, my hands wet on the wheel...
17) I want your soul, I will eat your soul (repeat)...
18) Im born, Im alive, I breathe and in a moment or two I realise that the sphere on which I reside is asleep on its feet...
19) I gotta lotta respect for the rich and the bored...
20) Well he's not necessarily trying to say that he minds it but someone plays evil tricks on that kid...
(the ones in bold are the one's someones guessed already!)
VIEW 25 of 45 COMMENTS
lara6666:
Come on over and find out for yourself! 
cancontrol:
11. search and destroy by Sir Iggy Pop