affy

I still havent found a job.

I look for signs. They tell me where to go and what to do. I havent had any signs here, I dont think. The only thing going through my head is that the lack of signs means I should be getting the fuck out of here.

Here I am, without a place to live steadily, no job, nothing, I could be anywhere and yet I still feel like I need to find a job here and get back on track. Am I supposed to be here?

Everyone just tells me to follow my heart and go where I want to. But I dont really feel like I belong anywhere. I dont want to be here, and I feel like going back to Illinois would be a step in the opposite direction.

Bah. I hate decisions.