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aeryka

Woodridge, Illinois

SG Since 2005

Followers 1409 Following 496

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Wednesday Jul 04, 2012

Jul 3, 2012
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things on my mind:

- everyone i love and know is going to die. alot of them will die before me and i will have to suffer the loss. im scared of it.

- alot of my friends are probably going to move away in the next 10 years or so due to economy, opportunities, dreams etc. my husband and i will most likely not live in this area. everyone who i am close with will not live near me. i will lose them. you say you will keep in touch but throw in a few hours drive, a kid or two and simple day to day life and i bet you it wont last. this scares me and upsets me.

the above two topics have been swirling around my head lately. the losses i have experienced this year have left me a little paranoid and jaded. not to mention terrified. yes i always knew them both in the back of my head but the reality never really hits you.

- my marriage isnt perfect. we still have a lot of work to do as a couple. im not perfect and neither is he but that doesnt mean it doesnt work. just because it isnt the same as your marriage doesnt mean that we are wrong. (not to anyone in particular on here)

- i think i wanna go back to being blonde

- i wish i had better ways of coping with stress and anxiety. i wish i was able to relax more. i need to find a way to relax more.

- i need a fucking vacation.



VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
doontheloon:
just thankin about ye!

(southern accent.)
Jul 4, 2012
punkdork:
everyone dies, in a way it's liberating. Some german philosopher once suggested that in death, you find what you want to do. I guess in a way, whatever you want to do is disclosed when thinking about death? Either way, the fact that you're going to die and everyone else is going to die adds beauty, personality, and temperance to life.

Also, yeah, the economy sucks. I'm graduating college, and I don't think that I'll find a job. HUZZAH
Apr 27, 2013

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