Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

aegiswings

New York

Member Since 2004

Followers 95 Following 116

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Wednesday Aug 10, 2005

Aug 10, 2005
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
Hallo everyone...
I never know how to start these journal entries. Especially when I don't have anything in particular to say.

Recently I've been thinking that if I was a good dancer all of my self-esteem problems would go away. This probably doesn't make sense. So listen. Dancing is about having rhythm, it's about coordination, and it's about being aware of your body and being able to move it how and when you want it to. But it's also about attitude and your appearance. Whatever you do, you have go out and be confident, because on the dance floor if you are unsure of yourself, it really shows. If you are the kind of person who comes off as shy, dorky, nerdy, geeky, awkward or creepy through your appearance or body language, it's only going to be magnified a dozen times on the dance floor. I've always been shy. I've always been somewhat awkward (though I am a million times better than I was in...say junior high). And I've never been a good dancer. Probably if I had a great self-esteem and I was popular, I wouldn't actually be a better dancer, but I would think I was so would it really matter? Or if I was a better dancer, and I went out there and I felt good about it, and people noticed, then I'd have a better self-esteem. See how they are intertwined?

When I first arrive at a club, I usually don't dance at all. I realize I'll probably make a better impression just sitting around as opposed to doing the white boy dance. The ironic thing is that after a few drinks, I am convinced that I can dance, and I do, even though logic says that alcohol would only slow my reflexes and inhibit my coordination. Perhaps there is some truth to the fact that alcohol "loosens you up". I also feel that alcohol makes me play the guitar better too, though that doesn't make any sense either (and I've been told that by sober guitar-playing friends).

So why do I dance? Well, I absolutely love it. I have such a great time. There is nothing better than dressing up and going out to a club and moving your body and letting the music wash over you. I like having other people around, but usually the emptier the dance floor the better. I've even been known to dance alone at home, by myself. I don't dance for other people! I don't dance to show off. I dance for myself and when I do, I am often in my own little world. It's probably why I have found myself hanging out in goth clubs. Goth dancing is introverted. It's dark and anti-social. Still, wouldn't it be nice if someday I could impress a woman with my dancing skillz?

...

Tonight, I'm going to go see Chemlab at the Middle East in Cambridge. I'm probably gonna drag Sid along with me. I've spent most of my free time (um, well, actually time I should be working) reading about electronic music on the web (before I couldn't tell synthpop from electroclash from synthtron from new wave from futurepop.) I've learned a lot. For example, I can tell you that Chemlab are innovators in the coldwave genre of trance and that Combichrist (who I saw at ManRay last month) are considered futurepop.

...

Question of the day: Would you date someone who said that their favorite ice-cream flavor was neopolitan? Discuss.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
aegiswings:
ah, thanks man, you're awesome
Aug 11, 2005
aegiswings:
I know wink
Aug 11, 2005

More Blogs

  • 02.01.06
    11

    Wednesday Feb 01, 2006

    I think I'm having the worst day ever. I'm a complete wreck. I found …
  • 01.24.06
    2

    Tuesday Jan 24, 2006

    I wonder if she reads this anymore? I know she did once, which is wha…
  • 01.22.06
    4

    Sunday Jan 22, 2006

    Read More
  • 01.21.06
    1

    Saturday Jan 21, 2006

    I'm having a oneparty tonight at about 9pm, any in the Boston area in…
  • 01.20.06
    1

    Friday Jan 20, 2006

    I haven't updated for many reasons... First, after last weekend I'm a…
  • 01.15.06
    5

    Sunday Jan 15, 2006

    I bahleeted the last few journal entries. I dunno if I'm going to kee…
  • 01.14.06
    0

    Sunday Jan 15, 2006

    bahleeted.
  • 01.14.06
    1

    Saturday Jan 14, 2006

    bahleeted.
  • 01.12.06
    3

    Thursday Jan 12, 2006

    bahleeted.
  • 01.10.06
    4

    Tuesday Jan 10, 2006

    bahleeted!

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

24
years
2
months
14
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,621 SuicideGirls
  • 1,113,818 followers
  • 15,009,642 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,600,604 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Complaint / Content Removal Policy | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo