aegiswings

I'm trying to piece my life back together. My parents tell me I should save money and not go out every night but if I don't go out I won't see anyone all day, besides whomever I buy lunch from and my roommate on occasion (but she is super shy and never talks to me). Even so, going out has become less fun recently.

I decided to cut Sarah2 off. I know that sounds kind of harsh, but I think it's best for my happiness... for now, at least. Who knows what it will be like in the future. After we fought on Friday night, I sent her an e-mail. The important part:

I was pretty drunk at the time I wrote it. I don't think she has even read it yet because she hasn't checked her myspace mail. In the meantime, she's called three times, left a message, and texted me twice, as if everythings the same. I haven't answered her messages. I still think about her a lot. I alternate from feeling really silly by taking this so seriously and feeling really guilty about ignoring her.

It's easy not to talk to people when you are depressed. I haven't talked to many of my best friends either. I sleep waaay too late and I can't sleep at night at all. I've gotten into some bad habits and it seems like I get even *less* done than I did when I was employed full time. I need some motivation, some excitement, and some reason to live.

Tomorrow the health inspector comes to look at my apartment. I'm wondering if my landlord is going to show up too. It should be an interesting experience.