in two weeks my schooling comes to an end and exams begin. I've started to think a lot recently about what I've learned since the semester started, and I mean life lessons not school lessons.
I think the first lesson is that its okay to say no when people ask if I'm okay. Because sometimes, and a lot recently, no, I'm not okay. I'm sad and I'm stressed and I'm mourning and I'm terrified. I'm still hurt over my grandparents deaths, and I never had a chance to get over my grandpas before my grandmother became ill. I watched my grandmother die while I was holding her hand. I've fallen behind in school because of that, and now I'm not gonna be able to catch up before the semesters over. My marks suck. I don't feel like trying. And most importantly, I'm worries I'm not in the right program. I'm not sure this is what I want to do with my life. So when you ask my how I'm doing. Or how its going. I'm gonna say no, I'm not okay. I will be, but for right now, no.
And the second is : it's okay to ask for help. My teacher taught me that surprisingly. She said it was okay for me to be confused and not sure what to do. And it was okay to ask for help when I needed it. I don't need to feel like I know what I'm doing at all times, I'm allowed to feel lost and try to work things out on my own and ask for her guidance I'm order to grow.
I'm sure Ive learned a lot more over this year, but for the place I'm in right now these are the best lessons I could be working with.
Xoxthanks for your time :)
