adenwilliam

Its not yet dark, but not yet light. I make my way into a small 24 hour diner. The only thing that I smell cooking is tobacco. I sit down in a booth and put both my elbows on the table. One is now covered in syrup. There are a few conversations that I can hear clearly. Any other day I would eavesdrop on them, just to put myself in the situation so I can contemplate what I would do in their situation. I've got too much other shit on my mind at the time to start trying to solve problems that don't involve me. I am meeting some friends here, of course they are late. I hear a female voice say, "oh my, its been so long since I have seen you!" This is not an uncommon thing to hear at a place like this. You always see someone that you never expected to see again, at a hole in the wall diner at 5:30am, on a Sunday morning, and of course you look like shit run over twice. With my eyes half open I look up and that female voice was looking in my direction. "It is so good to see you" she says as I realize that she is in fact speaking to me. I look her over from toe to head. Generic shoes. Blue jeans. Half empty coffee pot marked REGULAR. A knit shirt with a name tag that says "Adrienne." And a face that I cannot place for the life of me. But still I say, "its nice to see you too" with a sound of uncertainty in my voice. Just then the three friends that I am supposed to be meeting here walk in. They make their way over to the table that I am at. "hi, I'm, Adrienne. An old friend of Thomas' "she says and then turns back to me. We "catch up" for a few more seconds, she takes our drink order and then walks away. One of my friends says, "Who was that?" First I kinda just stare into the distance. Then I start to stutter, "Well. Uh. Umm. Then I finally spit it out. "i have absolutely no fucking idea" i say finally. All three of them laugh in unison. They don't have to say anything. I have heard that laugh before. It is what I like to call the 'i cant believe that just happened again' laugh.

Somehow this sort of thing happens to me all the time. If I go out to the mall is will definitely happen. If I go out to a show it will happen twice. These people who "remember" me come in all shapes, sizes, genders and age. There is something completely strange about a man in this late 40's to 50's talking to me like we are old friends. I just don't understand. I do not go out and socialize at parties and such. I have never had a one night stand (at least that I know of). I had maybe 10 ten friends in high school, all of whom I remember. So what the fuck is going on here. Am I leading some sort of double life and have a personality that takes over when I go to sleep? I admit that this sort of thing is very comical after it happens. But then in retrospect, I must come off like a complete jackass to the people that I talk to and they can tell that I clearly don't remember them. Am I the only one that this happens to? Am I insane? Do I just have a horrible memory? Am I an asshole that just doesn't remember anyone? These are the things I have to contemplate every time I come home from going out. I think I may just stay inside from here on in.

P.S. The first time I ever went to New York City some said to me, "Hey its been a while since I have seen you around here." I mean really, that is just fucked up!