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adeanyin

Albuquerque

Member Since 2003

Followers 38 Following 33

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Wednesday Jun 08, 2005

Jun 7, 2005
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I hate going to the doctors; $25 copay to find out that doctors are over paid, Well I went to an urgent care, not to my doctor. All this lady did was ask if I shoot up, poked at the weird thing on my arm and said it was a vain knot. Trust me, I on't want it to be anything more but just poking at it with your finger isn't that medical, Also having no treatment other then "wait to see if it goes away and by the way your skin on your arm is dry, you should use dove and not irish spring" d way yo begin the night I say.
So I bumped the arm with the weird lump after I got hime and it hurt like hell! So i'm going to my doctor in the mourning time.

Life has been moving way too fast the pact couple months.
It was fun at first but now it's too much for a shut in like me...
I wasn't meant for the whole dating thing, it never works out for me. I don't mean it like how everyone else does because they have relationships to complain about; I don't. I'm either your little brother ( trust me, don't ever let tell a guy that) and you can't even consider me that way, but you insist on being around me just to rub it in, or you have a boyfriend already, and just tell me you like me for some unknown reason. Which also feeds the madness in my head. So bottom line; If it won't work out then thats the kind of attention I get. Enough to give me short lived smiles but not enough to keep a smile.

Also my old friend called me today and we talked for a LONG time. She's suppose to goto the club this week so we can hang out. It just got me thinking about even though during high school my mom was on drugs and my best friend was becoming a meth head, dropping out, the ways I reacted out of it and all that; I still had a better idea of who I was.
Now it's just all so confusing and some how I feel like I lost parts of myself on the way here, but how can you mourn the loss of yourself? I have to slow it down, and remember why I started this.
And what you see is what's left of me
but I'm here
I didn't think I'd scare very easily
but I fear this thing,

I wish you love
With anyone else but me
I wish you love with anyone


I wish you love Again
I am surrendering me
Surrendering mine
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
lillithvain:
I love love love love love love love love love love you!

blush

Ps. *le sigh* blush
Jun 9, 2005
vanessa:
HAHAHA. Enola's alcohol and milk comment made me laugh my ass off kiss

Anyhoo, twin, you doing ook? we haven't talked for about a week and that's not goodfrown
Jun 12, 2005

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