adamia

Christmas is just a couple days away, and I just don't feel like it's Christmastime.
I can't get into the spirit. Usually by this time I'm wearing Santa hats and dancing to Jingle Bells.
I mean, shit, I haven't even started shopping. I have to do that before work today.
Unless that is I can't get my check cashed. I'll be so fucking jacked.
I...
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Why am I always faced with really tough decisions to make?
I shouldn't even have to be making these decisions at my stage in life, but thus, here I am back in the same old position. It's not a good position either. It's hard to make this decision because I've always done whatever I could to not be selfish, but yet my happiness is little...
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I hate women.
It's enough to make me want to turn completely straight.

I got a job.

but my life is still falling apart.
I can't wait to get out of this place.

It just sucks that I have to hurt everyone to do something so selfish.
I'm tired of thinking about everyone around me though.
My mind is completely consumed with this now.

the name's adamia, pleased to meet you.