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acidflesh

Nashville

Member Since 2005

Followers 9 Following 27

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Wednesday Oct 12, 2005

Oct 11, 2005
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I swear, there are times when it seems that the worl at large is conspiring to piss me off enough to go homicidal...... This is one of those times. Everytime I look in the mirror I see the piercings the girl totaly botched, everytime I put on a shirt I feel it rub on the back of my neck and I remember what the tattooist neglected to tell me. Every email I get from Megan just add to my desire to use very slow and imaginative ways to kill Wes, not just for my unborn he killed back when, but for the continued way he treats her. I do place a small bit of blame on her for staying with him, but he has abused and belittled and tore her so far down mentaly AND physicaly that I don't know if she could survive on her own any more. This is the girl I loved... the one I was going to marry untill fate decided to step in. We parted for good reasons and as the best of friends.

There are a very few things that make me snap. But hitting a woman, ESPECIALLY that woman, is one of them. For a woman I've never met, I'll step in and stop it if I can. For her... I would gladly kill that motherfucker if I was there. She knows this..... this is also why she is begging me NOT to come out there. Granted I have personal affairs there that need tending to, That is a VERY tempting side trip. Sadly it is one that I cannot afford to make, I DO know and understand my demons, I know their abilities and the limits on their cages. and if I was to get anywhere near him, I have absolutely ZERO doubt that I would kill him in a very brutal manner. So, for the sake of my life and in a way, hers, I shall remain here.

Even though I never actualy tried, times like these were the times I would get almost suicidal. Instead, largely dto an oath I shant discuss, I can't get suicidal anymore, I just very, very, angry, a dangerous kind of angry, the kind of angry I was during the fight of not long ago. Anyone who knows me most likely remembers those journal and or blog entries, and the end results.

I am only around because of a wonderfull person I met on myspace, one who has become my closest friend.

Thats enough ranting for now. Hell... I tried to stop ranting here and all, but gimme a break, it's been almost 2 months since I last let loose here, so.... you'll live.


Later
Acid kiss
anteros:
Damn, that's pretty intense...but more than understandable. If it were me, it would be past time to destroy something. Preferably something large, inanimate and already worthless. In lieu of that, a trip to the range would be in order. Large caliber, small target...always works for me. wink Try it. What have you got to lose? biggrin
Oct 16, 2005

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