acedia

well from the talk going around it looks as if friends and i will rent out a house and all live in it together! yes that should be grand. we're thinking about going up to portland because honestly who the fuck wants to stay in eugene right now? not I. well so I hear my ex has been drinking alot since we split, it dissapoints me, a ton. I didn't think he was ever into that and now I hear hes doing it until he passes out. its just....not him. but I can't control his actions nor have any say about anything he does because its out of my control and he doesn't give a shit I assume if I voiced my opinion about it anyway. grrr....I've been getting more and more stressed, I know I always say that but its to a point where I can't eat or hold anything down for long, I think I've lost 5 pounds in the last few days, and I can't sleep for more than a hour or 2 at a time. fucking sucks. I'm hoping this move coming up will cure that, maybe I'll have more positive things to focus on and can start over or just get out and meet more people, anything to help I guess. I've been throwing myself into photgraphy, I just printed up some photos yesterday, black and white. We show slides in class next week, the subject is light, I can't think of too many ideas how to capture that, so far I have light reflecting off someones back, teardrops, stuff like that. Hope those turn out well. Well I have to be getting to work, fun fun.