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ac1ds0ld13r

Charlotte NC Chesapeake VA

Member Since 2007

Followers 5 Following 9

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Tuesday Feb 24, 2009

Feb 24, 2009
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So. I have come to an earth shattering conclusion. Back pain is bad.

In other news: I'm finally getting out of South Carolina! If you've never been here. I'll give you a simple process to get the full effect of a visit to the Palmetto State. It's pretty simple:

1. Find a large hammer or mallet made of metal.
2. Beat your face and genitals with the above instrument for at least 45 minutes.
3. Preheat your oven to 375 degrees and make out with the racks once it reaches the required temperature.
4. Last, for the full effect, use feces and salt to cover all of your wounds.

That, gentle reader, is an idea what its like to be in South Carolina. SC Fun Fact: Nearly 40% of the population does NOT have a High School Diploma. So, whenever anyone asks me, "Do you think you're better than me?" I invariably reply, "Did you graduate high school?" If they answer with a, "No." My response is pretty straight forward, "Why yes. Yes I do think I'm better than you."

How can I come to such an elitist conclusion? Anyone that has been out of high school for more than a month can tell you how easy it was. I'm convinced I graduated by fucking anything with a skirt and occasionally doing homework. Never under-estimate the power of a highly motivated penis with an agenda. O.o

So, Virginia Beach here I come. Now, I'm sure I'll find things I hate there just as much. However I'm hoping bikini clad tourists will offset the suckage (not to be confused with genital suckage which is pretty cool).

Also, add to the wonderful world of retail. My company changed our return policy a month ago, and the illiterates are coming out of the woodwork like crazy demanding refunds for crap they've had for 4 months. Baffled by the fact that we don't honor Manufacturer's Warranties (seriously, its not a Retailer's Warranty, why would you be able to bring it back to me after four fucking months when your dumb ass kid spilled his fucking juice box in it and fried out your printer).

Well, that is all. Keeping with tradition I'll end this the same way I try to end all of my blogs.

Fuckers.

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