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absinthe

SG Since 2004

Followers 1655 Following 114

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Sunday Jan 15, 2006

Jan 14, 2006
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school again. I have a week before classes start. I came before everyone else so I could have the dorm to myself, pack everything for my move (into the room next door) and chill out a bit. I've been 6 plane flights in a month and I think I've transcended time zones.
Hawaii was all sun and perfect leafy and ocean green, I could see myself running away and living there, living of of coconuts and shaved ice from an aluminum sided truck, swimming everyday and turning golden like the sand.

Toronto was magical and perfect hotel-sheet snow white. I felt like a princess and over those days I could see a whole possible life unfolding in my head. A half of a townhouse painted blue with a balcony in kensington. Buying groceries at the market and big armloads of flowers, coming home to a house with sawdusty light and a pink soap ring in the tub. Snowflakes sifting down over everything falling down past my window view from the tallest buildings, fogging the glass.

California was itself, gray, flat, misty. I feel as though I can never outrun my memories of that place. I keep returning and they keep returning to me. I fly away but I always come back.
catagogo and I lurked around walmart, the movie theatre. We lay on the futon in her apartment and talked about boys. The rain was coming down biblical and so we only made it to SF once. I spent new years with my dear catagogo and the charming Mr Harry Potter, and this mystery cocktail made of Grenadine Champagne Vodka Pinapple juice. I slunk around my house and crept in all too late at night. My sister is doing her college aps and these ladies kept coming to the house to tell my mom to replace the carpet and paint the walls before putting the house on the market. X and xx were living in the snow working the resort and I was jealous as the rain fell and fell in the valley. I recently learned that x has become diabetic, which was cause for concern for me. It's easy to think things will always be mostly the same with people and then it just changes. There is this one field left in the middle of town that they havent developed yet. There was one, Tim Burton esque old tree out there in the field, and i drove by the other day and it had keeled over, uprooted. I wanted to go up to it and have a look but you cant really walk between the rows without trampling the crops of whatever-it-is or without fearing shotgun blasts.

But that's home for you. You never know what's missing until it is, and you just might get it back again in a different form.

College again and its all quiet and tranquil at 2 am. My room feels like a place someone else left behind, even after I started packing up all my things. i haven't stayed in a place for more than a week or so in about a month. A month isn't long but its enough to rattle your compass.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
anomaly1981:
you are very beautiful....you have a natural beauty....very awesome blush
Mar 18, 2006
jmm801:
lean wit it _ Rock wit it_ keep it doin wht u doin_
Mar 25, 2006

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