aandp

sometimes i feel like life is just rapidly zooming by me and i have no idea what's going on.
lately i havent felt like myself lately.
and it sucks.
but i'm trying.
so here is a pointform entry from yours truly.
enjoy:

-> no mini eggs @ my parents that was disappointing. i even went to look to buy some @ the store after easter and couldnt find any.

-> i've lost more weight. it's funny, because i'm not even trying.

-> i got offered a job @ the pet store near my house - whoo hoo. so i'll be starting that this coming monday. who rules.? i rule.! but this also means working close to 7 days a week and having no time for myself. *sigh* but right now, i have NO money. i'm tired of being broke. i'm tired of living like this. the big plus about the store... they close @ 8pm. that's kickass. so i'll be out of there every night by like 8:30ish. which doesn't put too much of a dent into my social schedule (as if i really have one - ha!)

-> last night was the first night in a very long time that i had a full 8 hr. sleep.... and let me tell you - it was fucking fantastic.

->had our "de-briefing" on the art show. our client came in and gave their feedback about the show. i felt they took a couple jabs at me. however, i'm overly critical of myself and the work i produce. a perfectionist to a certain extent.? anyways... the client gave us a 9/10 - and apparently, that's the best mark a class has ever got. so whoohoo to that. then after our client left, our teacher talked to us and gave us a 10/10. sigh. how excellent. all that hard work finally paid off. (as if they werent going to give us a good mark anyways, pfft)

-> i think ive mentioned here before but i volunteer as an event planning coordinator for the osteoporsis society. anywhoo - had a site inspection with them yesterday and it went really well. this event is gunna be huge (around 500 people) and super posh. i feel so out of place and like a child. but it's all gunna help me in the long run.

-> found out some upsetting news about my best friend. *pouty face*

-> with the beautiful weather, i'm thinking of writing some poetry. it's something i havent done in awhile. so today i'm going to bore you all with something i wrote back in july. im going to admit - i'm not the greatest writer in the world. but it is something i do enjoy doing.

have a fantastic day everyone.
and hopefully i'll be around. <3

- - -

passion and fury by moi.

What would life be like
Without ever knowing you
A negative, overexposed
Hollow images left for the imagination to fill in
Its hard to imagine
As I strain for thoughts
Of what could have been

How is it the seas have risen above me
Swallowed me whole
Overcome with the presence of your being
Gasping for air
Above surface
Swimming in beauty
Did I mention I dont know how to swim?
Hoping it is you that can save me.

I ache and moan for your simple pleasures
So different from the norm
Outside the box
Regardless of the cost
Ill invest
I could not imagine any less

A heart is never given a map
It persues its own course and direction
Sometimes we fall (its hard to get back up)
So difficult when feelings are involved
I dont want to be dramatic
But Im just being honest

Love demands expression
And Ive found my muse in you
Slap me if Im speaking out of line
But could you be happy in my arms tonight?
I want to give you the stars, the moon, the sky
I want to give you everything riches cant buy
This is intense. This is an affair to remember.
... But baby, could it be something more?

- - -

EDiTED:

ok, so i'm a little late on this but....
the notebook is so fucking sad.
ive just been bawling my eyes out crying.
and i realized how much i miss having someone i care about utterly and completely.
yes, you all can laugh at me.
i don't care.
i just wish i could wake up beside someone and look into their eyes and be lost in my emotions and know that person felt the same way about me.
god, i wish i could stop crying.