aandp

you know what i miss.
and i hope this doesnt sound all gay and pathetic.
but i miss having crushes and being crushed upon.
its been soo goddamn long where i've had a real meaningful interest in my life.
i guess with this holiday season everyone is all cherry and whuteva, getting gifts for their loved ones.
me - i've got my boys and that's about it.
i guess i just miss being romanced or miss being swooned.
i want someone who will curl up beside me during the winter and who i could kiss their forehead.
i just miss affection.

i keep telling myself tho... the more i look for it, the more i wont get it or find it.
so i try to ignore it and hope some fabulous person will come to me.
but in all honesty - i want it.
sigh.
let's hope christmas is my time.