aandp

life has been a little depressing as of life.
and while i'm trying not to let shit get me down.
i am .

not being able to afford to buy groceries.
or wondering how your going to pay your bills is fucking scary.
then having your parents (ie. the people who are suppose to protect you) tell you that your problems aren't there problems. it's kind of frightening.
then when you go through all the proper government channels and you do get 'help', but even that isn't enough.
i kind of get why there are so many people out there struggling to just survive.

it's only been a month. and yea, i've still got a roof over my head.
but i'm a realist.
i'm scared for what the future holds.
i've spent many days sitting in this rocking chair near the front window just crying.
it's hard thinking about everything.

- - -

i've lost 6 pounds, due to lack of eating.
my granddad just died. RIP granddad.

- - -

but i guess in more POSITIVE news.
i have been on a ton more interviews.
and a couple more places have called my references.
so i guess that means i should have a job soon?
one PR agency was really impressed with my writing sample i gave them. hopefully i will get a 3rd interview.
i have a telephone interview on monday.
and fuck, i hope SOMETHING pans out soon.
momma needs a job.

- - -

have you ever cried so many tears - that you just could cry anymore?
that's how i feel.