a_faust

ive never had a friend that hasnt screwed me, never had a friend that had my back no matter what, never had a friend that desired my friendship more than another, never had a friend that confided in me as i did with them....never had a friend to drive home with, never had a friend to push me forward and support me and never had a friend to lean on.

i got sent an email the other day from a friend ive had on and off for 12 years now

it said there are basically 3 types of friends
-party
-necessity
-life

needless to say i have and had party friends and it seem that the necessity friends, wheather its them needing you or you needing them, is what the others have revealed them selves to be.

now this friend that emailed me i realize that as much as i can count on this kid, he would never confide in me, never go out of his way to see me in 4 years of college, and the friends that he thought were life friends seem to ditch him all the time....how is it that a person can mean so much to 1 and yet the feeling is not recipricated, how is it that when advice is given to a friend, they think that you havent been there, you dont understand, its different this time, how is it that one can speak without being spoken to, can hear without listening, how can one be brushed aside so easily

Q.
what does one value more, drugs, pussy/cock, or friendship?

I ask this because i love my drugs and GOD only knows i love my puxxy, but if i went through life without being able to fucking hang out with someone and do absolutely nothing and everything all at once, then why the fuck am i sitting here

alive

once upon a time, i could control myself
once upon a time, i could lose myself