The painfull remnants of my soul have now completely gone. This can only be a good thing, as nothing can hurt me now.
I'd been talking alot to a girl called T lately. We met randomly online while she was at her cousins, didn't have net access herself, so we started talking on the phone.
When she first answered, I thought I had miss-dialled Cat's number, as that's who's voice I was hearing. I hadn't seen a pic of her, but she sounded so nice (like Cat) on the phone, and we got on so well, we decided to meet. When people say looks don't matter, they're lying. Well, maybe not lying, but looks DO matter to a degree. Maybe I had too high expectations, maybe hearing Cat's voice, I was expecting T to look like Cat. She did not.
She was a shorter, fatter and I'm sorry, but uglier version of Jo. I should have turned and come away. I wish I had. I had a nice enough weekend, as her mum and partner were really nice and welcoming, but between T and me, there was nothing. I just wanted to get away and come home.
Sunday she was really quiet. Her mum's partner says "Don't worry, the hot weather makes her like this, she says she hasn't gone off you or anything."
A few hours later, he says "I'm sorry, mate, (and by this point we really were mates) but she doesn't really feel ready for a relationship."
Not ready?! She was the one who prank called and expected me to call her back 4 times a day to then speak for hours at a time and texted me constantly. She was the one who wanted me to come down, and the one who constantly said she loved me, and now she's not ready for a relationship?!
As mentioned above, having seen her in person, I didn't find her attractive in any way, found we barely talked and wanted only to come home, so this didn't upset me in any way, but damn did it piss me off to think of the time and money I wasted talking to her.
I shrugged, thanked her folks for having me, and left as fast as I could, glad to be getting out.
To think I turned down a Jenny McCarthy lookalike Essex Girl to talk with T pisses me off, but in all honesty N was thicker than two short planks and we could only talk for a few minutes without getting bored, so it's not like anything could have worked out there either.
Still, this all got K out of my system, so maybe we can try and re-build our friendship.
At least this has shown me that my soul really has been destroyed, as before, something like that would have really upset me, but now I really couldn't give a fuck other than the financial loss.
The only person I really want, and have done for some time, is G, and she's sooo busy setting up her business, I wonder if she'll ever have time for me or if we ever will be together. Still, she's given me a licence to go Hunting, as she calls it, so why not have fun with that freedom?
*Names have been changed to protect the innocent, and in the case of G, not so innocent
)
I'd been talking alot to a girl called T lately. We met randomly online while she was at her cousins, didn't have net access herself, so we started talking on the phone.
When she first answered, I thought I had miss-dialled Cat's number, as that's who's voice I was hearing. I hadn't seen a pic of her, but she sounded so nice (like Cat) on the phone, and we got on so well, we decided to meet. When people say looks don't matter, they're lying. Well, maybe not lying, but looks DO matter to a degree. Maybe I had too high expectations, maybe hearing Cat's voice, I was expecting T to look like Cat. She did not.
She was a shorter, fatter and I'm sorry, but uglier version of Jo. I should have turned and come away. I wish I had. I had a nice enough weekend, as her mum and partner were really nice and welcoming, but between T and me, there was nothing. I just wanted to get away and come home.
Sunday she was really quiet. Her mum's partner says "Don't worry, the hot weather makes her like this, she says she hasn't gone off you or anything."
A few hours later, he says "I'm sorry, mate, (and by this point we really were mates) but she doesn't really feel ready for a relationship."
Not ready?! She was the one who prank called and expected me to call her back 4 times a day to then speak for hours at a time and texted me constantly. She was the one who wanted me to come down, and the one who constantly said she loved me, and now she's not ready for a relationship?!
As mentioned above, having seen her in person, I didn't find her attractive in any way, found we barely talked and wanted only to come home, so this didn't upset me in any way, but damn did it piss me off to think of the time and money I wasted talking to her.
I shrugged, thanked her folks for having me, and left as fast as I could, glad to be getting out.
To think I turned down a Jenny McCarthy lookalike Essex Girl to talk with T pisses me off, but in all honesty N was thicker than two short planks and we could only talk for a few minutes without getting bored, so it's not like anything could have worked out there either.
Still, this all got K out of my system, so maybe we can try and re-build our friendship.
At least this has shown me that my soul really has been destroyed, as before, something like that would have really upset me, but now I really couldn't give a fuck other than the financial loss.
The only person I really want, and have done for some time, is G, and she's sooo busy setting up her business, I wonder if she'll ever have time for me or if we ever will be together. Still, she's given me a licence to go Hunting, as she calls it, so why not have fun with that freedom?
*Names have been changed to protect the innocent, and in the case of G, not so innocent
)
im sure yr soul is still in one piece, yr just letting outside factors get to you
im glad to hear you got *k* out of yr system tho.
see, all that crap experienced paid off.
have a good day lovely.
xo
Good luck