_miked_

I need to get back to...
writing music
writing free verse poetry for lyrics
tattooing
painting
shooting pix
surfing
skating

I don't know why these activities have disappeared from who I was to who I am but I indeed plan on finding the things that made me again. I thought maybe I was getting dumber with age but I am pretty sure that it is more, I am giving up more with age. I will soon be a 39 year old boy. (June) I've been eating right again. (unprocessed foods) I need to drop the weight I have put on last year. I feel like poop. I think I am done drinking, as well. It doesn't suit me. I need to be the sharper keener animal I have always been known for as opposed to this mess I have become in the last couple of years.

(edit) -I posted this on someone's blog & maybe it belongs here too-
I'm not closed to new things but I am very disappointed with modern culture & the devolutionary spiral of the American Idol generation. I think I should have been born in a different time. I'm pretty simple & lucky enough to have made the type of money in my life to realize, it never made me happy at all. I only purchased responsibility & became a slave to a fantasy that will always be just out of reach. I was happiest when I was a broke artist, couch surfer. And though it's true, when you live in the past, you die a little each day, I feel it's important to never forget those ingredients that were of better times. I in no way expect to relive my salad days but to find an answer to that question we may not even know exist but is always the elephant in the room. What will make the pain of our knowledge of mortality bearable? I feel it may be weeding the trivial, meaningless bullshit from our lives. I'm not sure the hippies or the buddhist are right but it's not far off. Less shit = Less problems. I'm not sure I believe in strict material minimalism or the 60s free love type of irresponsibility. I do feel that both touch on good points & that a life stripped down from useless baggage & maybe not taking life so serious may help... Damn it. Bill Hicks has been screaming this at me and though I've been aware of this since I was a boy, the flesh is indeed weak & I've chased the wrong things for the wrong reasons. This isn't depressing. It's like admitting you have a problem. Then you can start to reshape it all.