_margot_

This is a test. This is a test of my central nervous system.

So I am pretty sure the ol' account is up in a few weeks. Not sure what's going to happen with all that. Now that I have half the site on ignore, I really wonder how much sense it makes to return. Certain people coming back make it hard for me to feel like it is the wisest choice. However, I do love a bunch of you..so we shall see.

This weekend has been ok, save for a panic attack last night that kept me up for quite some time.

I really hate that I spent so much of my life struggling with not feeling like I am enough. I really hate that at almost 30 I am realizing that I missed half my life. I also worry that one day he'll wake up and see that he is too good for me.

We found the perfect apartment for us, and it is cat friendly. Timing ain't right on it, though. Hopefully it will be around still in a few weeks. It would be a huge plus, as I am sure he is getting tired of not having any privacy in the studio we are sharing. I know I am having a hard time working out in the living room right in front of him. I feel so gross and clumsy when I try to work out. I hardly need an audience.

Wildswan-I swear, this week I will do the video. Don't beat me.

Tomorrow is my work event, Tuesday I have a job interview, Wednesday is Robyn Hitchcock, and,Thursday we leave for SF. Busy week.

Love to you.