_indica

Things have gone from not so great to terrible.
At least inside of me.
Me n the bf are okay but, im pretty confused about what he wants.
He is frustrated with me because I dont know what he likes sexually, because
he is my second boyfriend ever, and the one before him was an asshole.
So yeah I dont have alot of sexual experience.
He tells me he doesn't expect me to know what to do, or how
to do the things he likes, yet he is frustrated that I havent learned them.
I honestly have been trying everything I know (which obviously isn't alot) and
he always gets upset n just gives up when we are having sex.
Its really frustrating to feel like Im failing him.
And the fact that it makes me upset, makes him even more upset.

Im so tired of feeling like a failure. And of being accused of not trying.
I just feel like im not enough...

But instead of writing yet another venting blog let me also say
I went shopping after getting my dividend! Yay for getting paid to be an Alaskan!!!
And I got lots of cute new panties!!! YAY for cheeky lace boyshorts!!!!
Also I attempted to wash the bfs car today but he left for the bar before I could
finish, so here are some pics of me in my bikini...

At least being upset makes me write good poetry!
Talk to you all soon! Next time I write Ill be in Seattle! YAY!!!!



Im trying to loose weight n tone up before my first set!