I wish i could write something in high spirits and happier. But the truth is, I dont feel it.

I feel like I'm at a crossroads. I am really close to just letting things go with my exGF/ supposed friend. I'm having a really hard time letting go of all the anger and hurt she's caused since our breakup about 1.5yrs ago. I cant stand to hear her talk of her new relationship and how happy she is etc. Truth is, i'm tired of it.

I'm sure if I can find the means to get out there and grab some new friends, things would be ok. But that just seems like a daunting task. With the holidays in full swing, its just not the same with nobody by your side to share it with. I feel like when she left, a huge chunk of my soul went with her. I don't feel whole. I don't feel alive. I dont feel my beating heart. Theres all this abundance of love to give, and nobody to give it to.

.............