_dallas_

my grandfather died this morning. its frightening waking up to your mother screaming. running down the stairs in a panic. seeing his cold, blue, dead corpse. laying in your house. and you know hes too far gone. he had been there for an hour at the least. it was a stroke. or a heart attack. how can you just sit there and watch your father give him cpr. and just shake your head and hold your mother. the only person left in the world that truly loved me is gone. what now? i cant move out. my family needs me. my mother, my sister, my father. how did i not see this one? or did i? in deep sleep, dreaming, and hearing a thump from his room below mine. not sure if it was all in your head. but if not, was that the sound of his body falling limp. seeing him be poked and stared at by the police, the firemen, the ems. watching the body bag be wrapped around him, and his corpse carried out your front door.

what a way to say goodbye. does he know how much i love(d) him? does he understand he was my world?



ich liebe dich Grovater! soviel! warum?! warum Muss du mich allein verlsst. warum man Muss du stirbt.
warum?!


















this is all my fault. i should have seen it coming.





how could this not be the greatest man to have ever lived?!