_dallas_

i noticed that you noticed me. it has only been two years. i used to wonder what you wanted from me. as i would sit in the quiet that would fall over the room, i would think about how lonely it felt to know there was something wrong. no one attempted to look into my eyes. i had never received a polite nod or smile in return for the ones i so graciously gave you. although i wore those headphones, i could still hear every word. beneath the sound of my music device i could make out your whispers and read your lips. i could see what you said, though i never knew what you meant. i never understood what you wanted from me. i never thought i was so different. but now that girl has disappeared. she was lost to the change that would have inevitably come. i suppose you were just afraid. i suppose it was the unknowing of someone different. someone bold enough to stand alone. or maybe it was your lack of interest in learning something new. the carelessness of knowing of why she was who she was, and what exactly that was. i am disappointed by your shallow hearts. your closed minds lead me to regret this growth. i wish i didn't mature. i never wanted to grow up. the innocence of who i was kept me naive and easily pleased. now that i have your attention, tell me what you think. shout so i can hear you without having to watch your mouth word the thoughts you were too scared to say too loud. there is no point in hiding now. i might have changed, but the joke is on you. through my change, you changed too.

tell me your secrets, i'm ready to listen.