_catalyst_

Man.

If it ain't one thing it's the mothafuckin other.

I hate that I hate my man's best friend and his skanky girlfriend and pretty much all of their friends.

I hate that I don't want him to hang out with them --osmosis, you know?

< shudder >

I hate that I have no control over the situation.

I hate that I feel abandoned and hurt everytime he leaves me to hang out with them.

I hate that the only two ways of dealing with this involve me sucking it up and getting over it.

I hate that I'm so bad at getting over things.

I hate that I miss my best friends so much it hurts, but when I had them around I was thinking of other things so much it hurt.

I love my little brothers so much.

I love that I can make more time for them.

I love that we will be able to take them to the desert soon.

I love each of their personalities, how they clash, but are fiercely protective of each other.

I love that I'm going to have my own house in a few days.

I hate when I feel guilty for not being a good enough sister/daughter/girlfriend...

I hate when I feel guilty for spending money or for goofing off.

I love that I will have music very soon.

I love that as soon as I find the right artist I can get my art done.

I love that Shawn is so smart and I love that I get to watch him get really successful doing what he loves.

I love that I will be in school very soon.

I hate waiting for packages.

I hate never feeling lke I have enough clothes that are 'me'. My style changes too often.

I hate that almost all of adult funtime activities involve getting intoxicated.

I love my sister. She's freakin hilarious.

I love ice cream. and bed. I'm gonna go get me some of those.