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_catalyst_

San Diego Ca

Member Since 2008

Followers 122 Following 293

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Thursday Dec 22, 2005

Dec 22, 2005
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I've been trying to update lately, really I have.

But confronted with a blank white box and a blinking cursor, I am intimidated.

I have so much to say. Why can't it appear on the screen through osmosis?

I feel I am fighting off the dreaded flu.

I have had lumps in my throat for the past month...I have done a good job fighting it off thus far. The lumps have gone steadily down--UNTIL Tuesday night.

I went out for my best girlfriend's last night in town.

{It took me three hours of chugging vodka and beers to even feel a buzz, and then I just wanted to eat and pass out. this was my first time drinking in months and I have decided to get a divorce from alcohol--it doesn't make me happy anymore.}

Since then I have felt like shite and the lumps are bigger than eva and my whole body is aching. And I am exhausted and dehydrated and crampy because I'm about to start my period. Pooh on all that. But I know I won't get any worse. I am gonna avoid sugar, grains and starches and take it easy.

Shawn is home and was yesterday too. He's in bed all day because of a pinched nerve in his back. Feelin betta but restin it up today for the weekend.

It's always nice to have a 'sick buddy'. smile

I'm trying not to stress about going Christmas shopping at the last minute (meaning Saturday, AND we have to wrap the stuff and be at my parents THAT afternoon!). So far, it's not working. More deep breathing required. I'm trying not to stress that I can't buy any gifts , not even my PLP or my parents or Shawn.

I'm going to use it as inspiration to shower my loved ones with, well, love and gifts all the time. Why do we have to clump it all into one day and make it into a stress-fest?

My best friend ever, my oldest and dearest, my inspiration, got on a plane and moved to the opposite coast yesterday.

I cried a lot yesterday. Today I feel too exhausted to cry.

I just wanna get in and out of school already so I can go wherever I want whenever I want... oh and make some serious ends...

My esthetician/shrink said, "You know it'll happen in it's own right time, and everything will come together." It feels good to hear that.

Speaking of which, I had THE most embarrassing brazilian wax EVER yesterday!!!!! ACK.

Let's just say the icing on the cake was when I was getting off the table when she was finished.

All the air that had been forced into my pussy from lyin on my back with knees pulled to chest decided it needed to escape...LOUDLY... There was no hiding it, so I just said excuse me and kept makin conversation as I hurried out. eeek blush

Yah, anyway, so .........................................

For Christmas, I want:

~a piano
~tattoos: there are a million,
~my taxes and school registration fees paid
~to easily get an appointment and easily get everything taken care of with financial aid for school
~to feel like i'm making the right decision about which school schedule to pick {yes i am still trippin on that}
~an ipod
~a laptop
~a camera
~a job i love waay more than the last one {this is a great one to leave up to the universe. i don't know if i could do it on my own!}

Yah so, that's about it for now. I am tired {waah} and achy {waah waah} amd goin back to bed.
lemuria:
hugs and kiss es for you
Dec 22, 2005
lemuria:
good question. i think it may be a chipmunk but my husband says its a squirrell. maybe its a squirpmunk???? shocked
kiss
Dec 23, 2005

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