So I got pretty much all my xmas shopping done yesterday and so I am muchos happier about the holiday coming up but now I have to make a tough decision. I can either A)Go visit my extended family and have one of those big wonderful Christmases I have always dreamed about or I could B) Stay here and have Christmas with my fiance for...
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I'm having my first tattoo drawn up!!!! YAY!!!!
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
sechenie:
An epidural is when you have a long needle inserted into your spine for pain management while giving birth or having surgery. So I know I am strong enough to deal with it....I hope lol
cudnovati:
haha yeah, it is not as bad as one might think. i hope youll get it soon.
So I tried to get on Model Mayhem and I was denied 
not sure why. Probably didn't think my pictures were good enough. All well I guess its for the best
not sure why. Probably didn't think my pictures were good enough. All well I guess its for the best VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
sechenie:
Not exactly seeing as how I am not going to spend $100 to have 4 pictures to put on a website. So I guess it doesn't mean that much to me. That and I am broke. LOL but they were very high quality pictures just done on a timer. Might the fact I had to compress them a few times to make them work have something to do with it?
cudnovati:
probably the compression was a factor. then again, i can only guess they would have to be heavily resized and compressed to be rejected.
and i hear ya, $100 is quite a lot, there are other options, even if you take the photos yourself. the best will always be to work with a photographer, amateur or pro. amateur photographers should not charge you.
and i hear ya, $100 is quite a lot, there are other options, even if you take the photos yourself. the best will always be to work with a photographer, amateur or pro. amateur photographers should not charge you.
So I was talking to Ryan again about how even though I promised him I would never submit a hopeful set, I still think about it a lot (despite how I look) And he told me that if it makes me happy he is ok with me doing it but he would never want to talk about it, see what I did, and he would...
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cudnovati:
honestly i dont think you are selfish at all. I suppose you have wanted to do it for quite some time now, you can always shoot the set and decide later. its great to value his opinion, i guess doing it and not talking about its the fairest of options. Do what you feel its right. 
rickroyal:
Probably depends on why you want to do it. Examine your genuine feelings for wanting to submit a set. Perhaps then you'll be able to express to him why this is so important to you.
But ultimately you have to live your own life. Years for now will you look back and wish that you'd done it? Or will it be something you'll giggle about and be glad you never did?
If he would want to pretend that it never happened, though, it would probably create some friction even if he says it's okay. Is whatever you'd get from submitting a set worth the friction?
But ultimately you have to live your own life. Years for now will you look back and wish that you'd done it? Or will it be something you'll giggle about and be glad you never did?
If he would want to pretend that it never happened, though, it would probably create some friction even if he says it's okay. Is whatever you'd get from submitting a set worth the friction?
Okeydokey. So I finally talked to my fiance about something that I've been thinking about and I really thought he was going to freak out on me but he actually was fully supportive of it. Sooooo....I'm getting a breast lift! Yay. I HATE my saggy boobs. SO MUCH. I was so arrogant thinking 18 year old boobs wont ever get saggy so I didn't take...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
sechenie:
they wanted me to work with them but also attend their acting college which i can not afford. All well
cudnovati:
aww im sorry. keep auditioning, keep trying.
so i pretty much am bitter and hate the wedding dress i got. And at this point, I am so resentful of it i think i would prefer to get married in jeans. And I spent at least 300 more dollars on it than I wanted, and its not the dress of my dreams. So Im pissed in general. Blagh. Weddings suck.
cudnovati:
maybe its just the wedding nerves, no? after all, you did choose that dress for a reason. you will feel more comfortable with it as days go by. i know nothing about weddings tho, they are my worst fear.
mab:
awww im sorry!
im sorry!depressed. hate my body. hate my face. hate my self. hate my everything. Fuck the world.
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weston:
Hope you feel better about things and are in better spirits soon!
Hope you feel better about things and are in better spirits soon!
shaddy:
wow. sorry to hear you not feeling well. hang in there. no matter what things always get better, even if they get worse before they do. try not to be so hard on yourself. the world is rough enough, no need to add to it.
Update 
Getting married Dec. 16th, got my dress its a maggie sottero style Caprice absolutely wonderful, no shoes, but I have the veil on the way, my future sister in law is (i think still) getting married on the 30th of this month (it has nothing to do with halloween but we are gonna have a rockin halloween party i think) and my mom gets...
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Getting married Dec. 16th, got my dress its a maggie sottero style Caprice absolutely wonderful, no shoes, but I have the veil on the way, my future sister in law is (i think still) getting married on the 30th of this month (it has nothing to do with halloween but we are gonna have a rockin halloween party i think) and my mom gets... Read More
remod66:
Congratulations... happy wedding... and happy Halloween!
nickstone:
Good news! Congratulations!
So. he pretty much doesnt want Bonnie or I around, he kicked us out of the car so i wont get to see him till tomorrow, and then we are having a big "talk" and im gonna be SOOOO PISSED if he dumps me. I flew from WA to SC then drove for 3 days to see him. AND NOW im driving for more days...
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I talked to him a bit ago and we worked stuff out and the wedding is now postponed. GOODNESS GRACIOUS i feel relieved. Everything is so much more wonderful now that I am not stressing about that. And I am going to stay in TN i think. It would be cruel to his dog anyways for me to drag the poor boy all over the...
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cudnovati:
great news, come back soon!
actionbastard:
Thanks for the add!
I spent a lot of time thinking and I think I have come to realize that I am not ready for this. I have all of these things Im worried about. For example. I want him to be the happiest guy ever, and i want to make him happy. But I dont. I worry him and I do things he hates and he gets upset...
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cudnovati:
seems like you definetely need to push back the wedding, no need to rush something as important as that.
and well, i understand very well the concept of not "allowing" your girl/guy to talk to any men/women but it will never work out without trust and communication.
lots more to say but i will leave at that im sure you will figure things out.
and well, i understand very well the concept of not "allowing" your girl/guy to talk to any men/women but it will never work out without trust and communication.
lots more to say but i will leave at that
im sure you will figure things out.im getting cold feet about the wedding. I am afraid. And I dont think I can do this.
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southernguynj:
forget your feet. what's your heart gotta say?
alcahollis:
I honestly felt the same way but i went through with it and getting married is the best i dont regret it one bit..just stay strong and really dont be afraid to talk about it with your other half.
you will get the tattoo even if your family is not ok with it...or?