pyronautica

I don't usually blog, but I need to vent and have no where else to do it.

So... the boy that I like a lot and have known for 11 years got really upset with me two months ago because I told him I was interested in seeing other people because our relationship wasn't going anywhere and blah blah blah right?

Well, he says that he wants to be with me and he wants to see me exclusively. So, I said ok and for two months its just been him and I and things have been really good.

I stayed at his house last night and he knows that eventually I want to get married and have kids... and we're laying in bed cuddling and shit and he says to me, "I'm getting a vasectomy."

So I get upset and I'm like, "Why would you do that? You know I want to get married and have kids..." and he says, "You can... just not with me."

What was the fucking point of our discussion two months ago?!

The fact is that he doesn't want to be with me, he just doesn't want me to be with someone else.

He just wants sex.

I'm really upset about it.

I cried on the way home.

I should hate him, but I don't.

I wish I could just be a heartless bitch.

I feel so fucking stupid.

This must be what its like to be heartbroken. --- first time for everything, I suppose.