Thursday Aug 13, 2009

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I just got back from the funeral. These past few days have been harder than anytime I can remember. I love my Grampa so much...I'm drained.

Thank you so much for all the love and support in my last journal. It was much needed and appreciated.

I'm tired of everything right now.
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northern:
Hope you get a nice, long sleep.

Hugs!
skullgrid:
*** HUGS ***

Tuesday Aug 11, 2009

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It strikes me as funny how people who claim to be my best or close friend have made it extremely obvious the past 2 days that they really dont care about me. Part of being a true friend is being there when they need you. This sometimes requires you to set your own problems aside and give your friend a kind word, offer your fucking...
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murf9980:
Hey Sweetie,

So sorry to hear about your loss. Big hugs of love to you now and always!! love love I really don't know what else to say other then I am here for you now and always. Wheather you are here or you move away, and if EVER you need me, just call. Remember this always, you have one big slobboring, lovable, oof of a "big Murf love slave" here that will ALWAYS be here for you my friend.
Love you lots............

kiss kiss kiss
darkdrow:
Warm Thoughts and Luff today too...

<3

Tuesday Aug 11, 2009

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Im fucking livid. I was informed by work that Grandparents arent considered close enough relatives to receive funeral pay. So I have to decide if I should use my last two vacation days to go to the wake and the funeral or if I should just go to the funeral. This is my Dads father. I want to be there for my Dad ya know?...
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sameenvy:
Oh Tuessy, I'm so sorry, honey. I hope that you are able to find a way to go to both. frown
I love you. <333
skullgrid:
whoa. that's... ridiculous.

i'd be pissed too.

grrrr

Tuesday Aug 11, 2009

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Thanks for the kind words.

I'm working today then I head down to IL for the wake tomorrow, the funeral on Thursday. I don't want to do this. Hardly slept last night, everytime I came close to falling asleep id start crying again.

It hurts to let go of someone you love so much.

I wish I had happier words. I'm just nowhere near happy...
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wired:
Sorry to hear about the G-ma, i'm kinda in the same boat as you at the moment.
leib_:
<333333333333333333333333333333333333333333

Monday Aug 10, 2009

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My Grampa passed away this morning.

My heart is aching. Oh God, he was such an awesome Grampa, I love him so much. We all knew this was coming. He's had emphesyma for as long as I can remember and the past few months he's been and out of the hospital. Pretty sure he's only been holding on cuz he was worried about my Gramma...
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lilcupcake:
I am so sorry hunni frown Many hugs and condolences.
elizadoolittle:
Oh Im sorry Tooz. I only just caught this.
My condolences <3

Monday Aug 10, 2009

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So I'm desperate to get to MO now. Like frantically desperate. Being down there made me realize how much I do not want to be here. I belong by his side. I'm hurting because I cannot figure out how to get down there. I need money yet I cant even round up enough money to get my fucking teeth fixed.....I just want to cry

Instead...
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sanguine:
i always love looking at this pic of us...its the bestest!!!
northern:
Just keep in mind that any money you do get has to be used for your teeth, no matter how much you want to move. And I know you want both.

Sunday Aug 09, 2009

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Have I mentioned I'm miserable.

Please someone give me $3500 so I can just go now frown
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tubaart:
If I win the powerball, you've got it. .With a quarter billion friends like me, you'd have it made! whatever

kiss
digitaldavid:
Would you actually take it if someone offered it to you ? Not that I'm offering ... I wish I had enough money to just give it away to random cool people on the internet.

Sunday Aug 09, 2009

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Ever feel like God and the Universe are trying to tell you that you made the wrong decision?

I'm pretty sure I'm not supposed to be in Wisconsin. I should have listened to my Bubba and stayed. I dont feel like explaining why.

I had a ridiculously amazing weekend.

I miss him so fucking much...you just cant know unless you've been away from the person...
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northern:
I feel like God and the Universe are always telling me that.

I'm glad your weekend was amazing.
odinsbird:
Hang in there Voe, I know exactly what its like to be far away from the one you love, But you'll get there, and it will be all so worth it when you guys are together, But you need to keep strong and keep your chin up.
Love you <3

Saturday Aug 08, 2009

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So I'm at muh boys house biggrin biggrin biggrin

The airport went so smoothly. Kat gave me a play by play of what I needed to do to get on the plane and Derrek was waiting to pick me up a few feet from the plane biggrin

The past few days have been amazing. I've never felt so spoiled in my life. He's wonderful, his family is wonderful....KC is...
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stuntc0ck:
proud of you for going for it. Regardless of the outcome, sometimes you just have to say fuck it and go for it.
northern:
Glad you survived the airport. I knew you would.

You deserve to be spoiled.

I didn't know Kansas City was that big. You survived the airport, you can survive the city too. smile

Thursday Aug 06, 2009

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Okee I'm seriously nervous about the airport navigating experience. Tryin to stay calm, actually doing fairly well considering how panicky I can get. 28 years old and I've never flown alone....or wanted to for that matter. I'm excited about the flight itself. I like being on a plane, it's pretty neat....I wonder if I have a window seat hmmm....

The 6 month no sex vow...
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brightredscream:
I'll do it ASAP smile
itsy:
flying can be... scary! I always get nervous. not because it's flying... I think just because I get nerved up in general. did you get a window seat??

Wednesday Aug 05, 2009

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elicit77:
Daaaaayum! That pussy got attude. She's fierce! biggrin tongue
sameenvy:
Awwww <333
I miss you. And Kat.
Terribly.
Rescue me?
Please.

Tuesday Aug 04, 2009

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I am so happy as of late. I have started FLYing and I reorganized my budget, trying something new that will hopefully help me pay off more debt and save more. I have a strong desire to purchase a few tools but they aren't top priority right now, fixing my teeth is.

Speaking of which CROCHET FOR TEETH. Just tryin to raise money to...
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leib_:
whoooooooooooo biggrin biggrin biggrin biggrin biggrin
brightredscream:
I'm really excited for you...
I'll post your link on my Facebook and blog if that's ok with you?
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