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I had a wacked out dream last night! I mean, it was looney! Here is goes.

I was in the bathroom with a friend. I had to use the bathroom, but there were no doors on the stalls, so I figured what the hell, so I started my usual ritual of wiping the toilet with some toilet paper, then carefully placing toilet paper on the seat so I can sit down without actually touching the toilet (this only applies when I'm NOT shit face drunk) then I proceed to sit down, and there is this chick just standing there looking at me. I was like, what the hell are you looking at? She just continued to stand there, so I told her "this is my stall, get the hell out of it and stop staring at me". She finally left, to reveal three hard core lesbians in a stall directly across from me who were getting off to me sitting there naked on the toilet, so I told them "and that includes you too". So they left as well. THEN the doors opened and people started pouring into the damn bathroom, construction workers carrying equipment to fix the stalls, teachers, students, men and women! All pouring through the doors and looking at me sitting on the toilet! I turned to my friend and said "what next, Santa Claus?" And, of course, at that some guy, who I apparently had a major crush on, came in dressed up in some sort of mascot suit, and proceeded to talk to me. I wanted to die! I managed to pee (oddly enough I didn't actually have to USE the bathroom in real life, which is probably a good thing!) and got out of the damn bathroom. Okay, so I'm walking along a crowded corridor, and I run into another friend (who the hell knows what happened to the first friend...too embarrassed to stick around I imagine! lol) and I tell her about my traumatic bathroom experience and start cracking up laughing. I mean, the kind of laughing that brings tears and causes you to not be able to breathe properly. Anyway, she decided to calm me down by taking me to a museum. So, I was standing there, looking at some sea creatures when I noticed Arnold Schwartzenagger was standing there. I lingered until he made his way over to me, pretending not to notice him, and he KNEW MY NAME! lol He said "Hey NAME (haha), how are you doing today" I looked at him and said, "how do you know my name?" I wanted to say more, but my mouth was extremely dry, and no matter how hard I swallowed I couldn't get any moisture into it (I later realized I was sleeping with my mouth open and it was infact exceptionally dry! lol) Anyway, after Arnold left I went back to where my other friend was, who was attempting to pick up this hot blonde chick, and I proceeded to kiss her on the hand with my overly dry mouth when I woke up. I mean, WHAT THE HELL?

***Okay, who the hell invented the idea of laundry and the fact that women are the ones who do all of it! I have three step kids and a man! I am sweating my ass off here! I just folded and put away 13 towels! 13 TOWELS!! And that was just for the kids bathroom! AND just from last week! What are they doing with those things? Building tents?***

***Did I say 13? I meant 17!! 17 FREAKIN' TOWELS!!! I need a nap***