Sunday Jun 21, 2009

0

Read More
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
rockgirl0204:
oh no wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy this is the best pic !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
raynne:
Aww really? I had no idea!

Saturday Jun 20, 2009

0
Fighting the depression, and all the other issues, I haven't gone out with anyone, one on one, since January.

Been really hard to like myself. And if I don't like me, I can't expect anyone else to.

So

building up all my nerve, I asked a girl out

Dinner and a movie

She said yes!

Date was for last night

I called to ask what...
Read More
VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
billieprudence:
Thank you.. this really mean a lot to me smile REALLY blush
sfaery:
Aw sweetie thank you. You are so great kiss

Monday Jun 15, 2009

0
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." - Dr. Seuss





I love you, Karla, and I'll miss the hell out of you.

Enjoy your life.

And thank you for being the best friend I've ever had.
VIEW 20 of 20 COMMENTS
dryad:
That is a wonderful quote.

And I would love to get paid for this. smile
amesiella:
Saturday is supposed to be sooo much better than Sunday- and longer!

Sunday Jun 14, 2009

0


I called 10 people

nobody had the time to talk

i just needed fucking human contact

couldn't get that.

so, self harm happened.

i have to stop believing people when they tell me to call them, when they say they care.

bullshit.
itsybitsy:
i hate it when that happens
poopypest:
i'm listening Johnny Cash right now! wink

Saturday Jun 13, 2009

0

Read More
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
lighthammer1979:
Congrats on the weight loss. smile
spazzing:
woohoo! congrats smile

Friday Jun 12, 2009

0
Thinking positive.

Not gonna give in.

fuck, this is hard...
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
valkyrie:
Hi, thank for your comment on my blog. smile I appreciate it. I have posted all my depression photos here if you want to see them in their entity. Hang in there, everything's going to be alright. kiss
countessa:
Thanks for the kind words in my blog, I hope you're right about my set going pink! Heh

Friday Jun 12, 2009

0
I feel like I'm losing the fight.

This is killing me.

I can't even count on my feelings to be real.

What the fuck kind of way is that to live?

Why would I even want to live if I can't trust my feelings to be real?

No, I'm *not* in love with her. Thanks to a loooooooooooooooooooooooong talk with a trusted friend, I realized...
Read More
zepp:
depends on the size darling.

Friday Jun 12, 2009

0
I just can't trust my feelings.

I love her. That's a given. I've told her that.

The question is how do I love her?

I've had a crush on her for quite a while now. Couple years, easily.

I think what I'm feeling is a romantic love. But I'm just not sure. I can't be.

Not with everything going on in my head.

Is it...
Read More
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
punkie:
love is a strange thing...if you think its love it probably is. just trust your heart. if you've liked her for that long its probably love!! awww smile
ladyaurale:
Or is it that you've loved her for a while, and the depression screwed with your emotions.
With the chemical imbalance righting itself from the medication you're finally able to feel what's been there all along.

Thursday Jun 11, 2009

0
I weighed myself this morning.

ONE HUNDRED NINETY SEVEN POUNDS!!!!!

I am under 200 pounds for the first time on waaaay too many years!

I've lost 58 pounds now!

Holy shit, dealing with the depression and BDD and ll that shit, this is some of the best news I could ever have!
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
ladyaurale:
*huuuuuuuuuugs*

That's awesome news doll!
Now start taking care of your head, I'd hate to have to come all the way to Cali just to kick your ass around smile
lys:
Congrats on the weight loss! Im trying to lose weight too, and 58 pounds is incredible and inspiring. Keep it up!!! biggrin

Thursday Jun 11, 2009

0
Sunday will be my last chance to spend time with Karla. One of only four people to have a permanent place in my heart as a very best friend. She ships out a few days later.

And I fucking hate it.

She's been a rock, holding me down when my brain was trying to take me somewhere bad. She held my hand, was my moral...
Read More
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
maryjay:
its hard when friends leave and when you leave your friends..I understand all to well...now I have none...frown...hope you feel better soon and chin up darlin!
tweedle:
I'm sorry about your friend... I know how hard it is when people leave. But wherever she's going for whatever reason, gotta remember how important it is that you support her... because she would support you too. I hope you hold up okay, if you need anything or want to talk let me know

Wednesday Jun 10, 2009

0
I am not giving into the weakness anymore.

I cannot, will not.

I will fight this depression head on, for all I'm worth.

If I fail, it's not for lack of trying.

I'm tired of the drinking.

Tired of the cutting.

Tired of not feeling worthy of anyone.

FUCK THAT

This shit will end on my terms. I will not allow the depression to rule...
Read More
VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
exning:
oh he deserved it.
ricci:
My current job just doesn't make me feel better, but I know if I just quit, I'd be having panic attacks because I wouldn't have any money coming in!!!!
This job sounds good. It's at a book store for 30hrs a week which is a little less than I do now, but after 3 months it pays more! It seems a lot more worth my effort!

I'm actually kind of rambling because it's 7am in the morning, and I am never up at this time surreal

Monday Jun 08, 2009

0
I got one of my friends back!!!
VIEW 16 of 16 COMMENTS
dice:
No I have never played North Bay but I know a lot of bands from there.
dice:
haha not at all!
Join Now to see more