cheshirecat

i drank tooo much last night and have a hang over....the sunset today is beautifully melting into the ocean in a glob of orange ,reds and purples......my dream this morning consisted of a house which is not there , a car ride never ending with a mystery woman shrouded in fog.

so i am still getting up at 2 in the afternoon .....i just cannot shake it there is too much to do at night....saw a good closing act at Spaceland ...........went somewhre very familiar in my dream this morning.........still searching but not exactly sure for what ,maybe when i start going to CalArts i will feel better .....always feel better when painting or creating something...
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the Dead Ringers and videodrome double feature was good ,never saw Videodrome before alot like Existenze or i should say that Existenze is like a extension of Videodrome then came audience questions which were kind of lame ( no good questions) then Cronenberg went into his aethiest speech which kinda bothers me cause i do believe in something that is beyond comprehension, it just seems...
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I met david Cronenberg today at the egyptian theater ........love his movies tomorrow there is a double bill of Dead ringers and Videodrome .......drove around L.A. in a dream state today as well ...can you love and hate a place that much???

I love waking up to a new me......as if the other did not exist....scary the road you can travel in yr mind.

its not a matter of not wanting to do anything or a lack of things to do......it is the wanting to do everything at the same time or at the very moment that it enters my head which conflicts with the outside world or i should say my inner world conflicts with the outside world......i want life to be an adventure and in a sense...
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god knows i TRY to get up early but i cannot shake going to bed at 4 in the morning.........to many things going through my head ,i have to filter them out .....but i did apply to Cal arts and should get in .....now it is just a waiting game.

DrEaMs............

my dreams seem to be taking me over if not revealing some hidden truth........last night i dreamt of 3 hidden moons ,reality seemed to come crashing down upon me transcending me to some higher reality which exists above arbitrary every day existance.....like floating in light where i forget everything and then it crashes with the wake of consciousness........I seriously think that we or at...
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