This is a poem idea I've had for a long time. I get stupid, crass verse ideas, and then I think about wordplay around them, and then all of the sudden one day I think of 3 or 4 dumb puns or rhyme schemes and then sit down and think of a few more and throw in some odd things, like the name of some utility infielder of the 1982 Orioles (I have a fascination with the name "Wayne Krenchiki," so sue me), and then it's done. So anyway...
"Banging Keira Nightly"
It seems, in my dreams,
there is one enlightening scene
therein nightly
banging in mightily
a vision respitely
and if I had to choose
these views would ooze out and peruse
in my mind spritely,
in the pale moon, lightly,
and a daytime sight-see
for, in my dreams, all I sees
is her boobs, butt, and knees-
Keira Knightley
in her carefree nightie;
I wish I were
banging Keira nightly
I don't wish to dish indiscreet
on biting her bum or licking her feet
or such things unsightly,
seeming laddish or shitely
I simply long to be
in a squid's garden under the sea
banging her nightly
banging Keira Knightley
banging Keira nightly
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
appendix- By "laddish," I mean "like a lad" in the English sense, a bounder or scoundrelous type.
Part of the poem is taken from Berke Breathed. IN an old Bloom County, Steve Dallas wrote a sensitive love poem that included the lines- "in my dreams, you're all I sees/ boobs, butt, and knees/ be my main squeeze."
I'm actually not obsessed with Keira Knightley. I'm more obsessed with Helen Mirren and Jennifer Jason Leigh, but then I couldn't write "banging Helen mirrenly," could I? ...I suppose I could write "banging Jennifer jasonly," but that will have to wait for another day.
If I was to obsess on Keira Knightley, I suppose it would be the hot, androgynous, athletic Keira of Bend it like Beckham. I always did like soccer women, and her boyish haircut and soccer kit
"Banging Keira Nightly"
It seems, in my dreams,
there is one enlightening scene
therein nightly
banging in mightily
a vision respitely
and if I had to choose
these views would ooze out and peruse
in my mind spritely,
in the pale moon, lightly,
and a daytime sight-see
for, in my dreams, all I sees
is her boobs, butt, and knees-
Keira Knightley
in her carefree nightie;
I wish I were
banging Keira nightly
I don't wish to dish indiscreet
on biting her bum or licking her feet
or such things unsightly,
seeming laddish or shitely
I simply long to be
in a squid's garden under the sea
banging her nightly
banging Keira Knightley
banging Keira nightly
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----
appendix- By "laddish," I mean "like a lad" in the English sense, a bounder or scoundrelous type.
Part of the poem is taken from Berke Breathed. IN an old Bloom County, Steve Dallas wrote a sensitive love poem that included the lines- "in my dreams, you're all I sees/ boobs, butt, and knees/ be my main squeeze."
I'm actually not obsessed with Keira Knightley. I'm more obsessed with Helen Mirren and Jennifer Jason Leigh, but then I couldn't write "banging Helen mirrenly," could I? ...I suppose I could write "banging Jennifer jasonly," but that will have to wait for another day.
If I was to obsess on Keira Knightley, I suppose it would be the hot, androgynous, athletic Keira of Bend it like Beckham. I always did like soccer women, and her boyish haircut and soccer kit
suits her better than the whole bodice thing, imho.
Anyway, hope you enjoyed.
D'ya think it's worthy of submission to Urban Poetry Group?
VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
alyssum:
Well, A) It's funny, and B) Keira Knightley...
doctashock:
Sucks to see you leaving the site... mainly because I hate MS, but I'm sure we'll stay in contact either way.
