anger_frog

Bloody knackered and broke.

I'm still doing the no-smoking, regular gym workout dealie, but my energy levels are still pretty inconsistent. Of course, having abso-fucking-lutely nothing to do in this one-horse shithole makes having any level of energy a moot point, but I still think feeling worn out and ragged all the time is wearing a bit old.

And yeah...broke. My school changed their grant...
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Fucked if I know.

I've been in an inexplicably good mood lately. My personal demons have been demoted to part-time, the trailer culture existing near me has ignored my presence (must be a Cops marathon on) and I've iniatiated my health regimen again, this time with success. I haven't had a smoke in three days and I've been to the gym twice this week. Things are finally starting to...
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Just not feeling it. I'll bullshit something later.

I had a terrible nightmare last night. I was trapped in a cabin at a ski resort with my ex (Raven's mom). She was pregnant again by her most recent ex (and current bf? i think i ranted about their creepiness in an earlier entry) but she professing her overwhelming attraction to me after sustaining severe head trauma. There was no else to watch over...
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I got earlier than usual today, and did some cleaning. I also gathered some junk for a yard sale that the local members of my family will be having tomorrow. Anything that was useful but I no longer I placed into the sales cart my father drove to my uncle's. I keep amassing so much useless rubbish, usually as gifts from forgotten aunts or inheritence...
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MY SHITTY ADVENTURE

Well, it was really an adventure, but it certainly was shitty. It was more like a riding lawnmower getting stuck in a septic leach field and the process of trying to get the damned thing out of a pit of mud saturated with raw sewage. Which took about an hour. Very shitty.

Update:

Ok, had this sinus had from that mown grass...
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Fuck. Didn't go to the gym, and I ended up buying another pack of smokes. At this rate, I will never be a Chippendale dancer! I guess I'll have to get by on charm and pretty face for a little while longer...

For the past four mornings, it has burst forth hard rain at 4 a.m., leaving an oppressive reign of humidity for the rest...
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Mostly boring today, but I'm trying the health thing again. No more smokes, eating right and exercise. I'm doing good so far, but my body is rejecting the vegetables, retaliating with a horrific case of heartburn.

Update:

I just had an idea. Remember that scene in Boogie Nights, with the berobed coke dealer sang along with Night Ranger while the Vietnamese love boy walk around...
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It always seems like when its time to update this, I have nothing to say. So....questions?

Later that evening:

Okay, I thought of something I wanted to write about myself. I'm trying to quit smoking. Again. I've quit smoking three times this years, and I'm shooting for number four. Or, I was until I just bought a new pack about 10 minutes ago. You see,...
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...and then I dipped my balls in it! Oops, wrong journal.

Anyway, yesterday was a complete contrast to the day before it. Two days ago, I was feeling optimistic, creative and libidinous. Yesterday, I was lethargic, apathetic and dismal. This reinforces my theory that I need get my sleep fixed for more daylight exposure. I'll stay up again today and try a few things that...
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My experiment to return to daylight living has failed horribly. I tried going to bed early last night, but muscle spasms came back from their months long hiatus to remind me that they still exist and are resentful for being ignored. Not only did they make getting to sleep difficult, but I tend to oversleep after a bad attack as my body tries to right...
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