75rhino

i used sg for it's pornographic purpose
for the first time
in along time
i melted
life seems a lot simpler
no need to push
i'm ready to jump

"the streets"
if you haven't heard him
go buy it
this is the last pack of cigs
yeah right

why am i only attracted to women who are just as fucked as i am? if that sounds negative it's not. it's a legitimate question. it's perfect in it's inperfection and brings a smile to my face. nothing is ever what it seems. but not returning phone calls is just cliche. she cshould have just abandoned me at the lliquor store like she said she...
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i watched deadman tonight
with an amazing woman
drank beer
and talked about being crazy
too perfect

i spend a lot of time talking to myself lately
right now i'm just too honest
it makes people uncomfortable
what a strang world i've built for myself

i hate the bullshit rules of engagement
for when you first meet people
playing coy is so fucking laim
just smile and nod

so i met this girl at school
she's great
she has so much pain in her eyes
i don't want to hurt anybody
everybody carries around so much fucking pain
it had to get worse before it got better
and today was the worst
atleast i hope so
i felt like fucking howard hughes
i just kept repeating things
i still haven't been able to...
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a little bit less today

i just sat here staring at the screen for ten minutes
thinking of a way to explain my life to myself
i'm just terrified
i fell like a fish that's been in a tank for three years
and now it's back in the sea
i'm not sad or depressed
just really fucking confused
about what direction to go in
i guesse i can just focus...
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sometimes things that aren't meant to be
can really fucking hurt
but its just not meant to be
it took me vommitting on myself and five days to get to that
fucking love
i'll do it again
there's nothing like it
i'll just have to enjoy my downtime