Hey...
I'm in Saan Francisco, walking around at night, writing, drinking beer in the dimly lit alleys and thinking for what it's worth. Everyone I meet here are living some sort of succesful life. Happy, in relationships, money and so on. I have none of that, and I'm not shure if that bothers me or not...
Some part of me want all that. Wife, kids, the whole lot. But at the same time, I'm kinda scared to start it all, cause it would make failure so much more powerful. I guess I'm beginning to feel like I should have accomplished something by now, or fit in our societys little rules better. A mild sort of panic that doesn't apply to me at all, so why the hell is it there?!?
I found an entry that made me smile though (not that I'm unhappy, just confused with myself). Made me go back to my more unconcerned, free-spirited mood:
SUNDAY MARCH 02 2003 11:35 PM
Open letter to America:
Please people, we are all sinners!
You can keep your crucifixes, well-manicured lawns and award-winning family entertainment. I want to know about your perversions, your obsessions, your secrets - we all have them so get over yourselves. This, such a schizophrenic land, coated with the shiny lacquer of wholesomeness and sanitized for maximum commercial appeal and rolled up in the big soft fuzzy rug of God and Family, only there's dead gangrenous toes sticking out the other end.
America is the land of dishes being thrown at Daddy and flabby strippers grinding their tired pussies in your face and small-town speed freaks shooting up in the back of pickup trucks and Betty Jo putting mascara on her toddler for the beauty pageant and smirking cops shoving broomsticks up the poor immigrant's ass and Uncle Jimmy's fingers sneaking into all the wrong places in the middle of the night.
The world is an ugly and brutal place. But morally, we are no better than anywhere else. I love this country because the people are basically good but please, the hypocritical sanctimoniousness has got to go! We drive huge arrogant cars and let children die from cancer because they're poor and execute innocent people and think that our dead civilians are more important than dead civilians in other places. We drop bombs on little kids in enemy countries because those countries won't give up the arms that we ourselves sold them. We need to stop lying to ourselves...
Tomorrow is my birthday and the only present I want is for all of us to take a long hard look in the mirror and understand what is really going on (well, that and for all my friends and loved ones to be safe and happy wherever they may happen to be).
Thank you, good night.
I'm in Saan Francisco, walking around at night, writing, drinking beer in the dimly lit alleys and thinking for what it's worth. Everyone I meet here are living some sort of succesful life. Happy, in relationships, money and so on. I have none of that, and I'm not shure if that bothers me or not...
Some part of me want all that. Wife, kids, the whole lot. But at the same time, I'm kinda scared to start it all, cause it would make failure so much more powerful. I guess I'm beginning to feel like I should have accomplished something by now, or fit in our societys little rules better. A mild sort of panic that doesn't apply to me at all, so why the hell is it there?!?
I found an entry that made me smile though (not that I'm unhappy, just confused with myself). Made me go back to my more unconcerned, free-spirited mood:
SUNDAY MARCH 02 2003 11:35 PM
Open letter to America:
Please people, we are all sinners!
You can keep your crucifixes, well-manicured lawns and award-winning family entertainment. I want to know about your perversions, your obsessions, your secrets - we all have them so get over yourselves. This, such a schizophrenic land, coated with the shiny lacquer of wholesomeness and sanitized for maximum commercial appeal and rolled up in the big soft fuzzy rug of God and Family, only there's dead gangrenous toes sticking out the other end.
America is the land of dishes being thrown at Daddy and flabby strippers grinding their tired pussies in your face and small-town speed freaks shooting up in the back of pickup trucks and Betty Jo putting mascara on her toddler for the beauty pageant and smirking cops shoving broomsticks up the poor immigrant's ass and Uncle Jimmy's fingers sneaking into all the wrong places in the middle of the night.
The world is an ugly and brutal place. But morally, we are no better than anywhere else. I love this country because the people are basically good but please, the hypocritical sanctimoniousness has got to go! We drive huge arrogant cars and let children die from cancer because they're poor and execute innocent people and think that our dead civilians are more important than dead civilians in other places. We drop bombs on little kids in enemy countries because those countries won't give up the arms that we ourselves sold them. We need to stop lying to ourselves...
Tomorrow is my birthday and the only present I want is for all of us to take a long hard look in the mirror and understand what is really going on (well, that and for all my friends and loved ones to be safe and happy wherever they may happen to be).
Thank you, good night.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
I want to go to SF too! One day, one day I will make it.
I got your CD in the mail the other day, but I haven't had the time to listen to it yet...
did you learn german in school???
for me its about 4 years ago that i had englisch exercises and i know its slowly dying, but i will work hard...
you are a skateboarder,he`?! skateboarding rulez, phatt streetstyla!!!
jeah would be cool if you paint...let me know what comes out....
cya in hell