When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil.
Lenore
Lenore VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
I bet a fun thing would be to go way back in time to where there was going to be an eclipse and tell the cave men, "If I have come to destroy you, may the sun be blotted out from the sky." Just then the eclipse would start, and they'd probably try to kill you or something, but then you could explain about the...
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VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
davidgr:
I will kidnapp you, just tell me when. email me babe.....
mrzablowdowski:
good laugh and relax in the hot tub
as they add carrot , onion, and potato
as they add carrot , onion, and potato
Too bad you can't buy a voodoo globe so that you could make the earth spin real fast and freak everybody out.
Lenore
p.s. I can't believe it's not butter!!
Lenore
p.s. I can't believe it's not butter!!
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
woodplank4wheels:
IF I PLACE THE PENELOPE PUNK UPON THE BANANA SHRINE, WILL RAZOR BLADES FINALLY FALL FROM THE SKY?
demigauge:
or put pins in countries heh
Too bad you can't buy a voodoo globe so that you could make the earth spin real fast and freak everybody out.
Lenore
Lenore 
trilobyte:
I thought that's what's been happening!?
I like voodoo dolls of complete strangers. So if you're ever walking down the street and you see someone double over or suddenly they trip, you know it's probably my fault.
I like voodoo dolls of complete strangers. So if you're ever walking down the street and you see someone double over or suddenly they trip, you know it's probably my fault.
A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. "Hear that?" you say. "That's dynamite, baby."
Lenore
Lenore VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
trilobyte:
It's also a way to get them excited...
trilobyte:
Happy Un-Birthday!!!!!
The next time I have meat and mashed potatoes, I think I'll put a very large blob of potatoes on my plate with just a little piece of meat. And if someone asks me why I didn't get more meat, I'll just say, "Oh, you mean this?" and pull out a big piece of meat from inside the blob of potatoes, where I've hidden it....
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VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
kingskottie:
red skinned mashed potatoes with garlic. meow meow!
davidgr:
Hey dude, email me back......been a while since we last chatted, I hope all is good
Fear can sometimes be a useful emotion. For instance, let's say you're an astronaught on the moon and you fear that your partner has been turned into Dracula. The next time he goes out for the moon pieces, wham!, you just slam the door behind him and blast off. He might call you on the radio and say he's not Dracula, but you just say,...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
trilobyte:
Can I just say this without sounding all stalkerish?
I LOVE LENORE!
Your posts are so clever and funny and original and completely out of left field. Today's for example had me laughing so hard that tears were running down my cheeks, and then I stopped suddenly and thought "hmmm" because it's generally good advice. And I've never known anyone who celebrates as many birthdays...
[Edited on Mar 13, 2003]
I LOVE LENORE!
Your posts are so clever and funny and original and completely out of left field. Today's for example had me laughing so hard that tears were running down my cheeks, and then I stopped suddenly and thought "hmmm" because it's generally good advice. And I've never known anyone who celebrates as many birthdays...
[Edited on Mar 13, 2003]
I wish I had a Kryptonite cross, because then you could keep both Dracula AND Superman away.
Lenore
p.s. I need a new tattoo!
Lenore
p.s. I need a new tattoo!
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
trilobyte:
check out a very rare profile pic appearance of Mr. Skull
And Mr. Skull suggests a skull if you don't already have one...
And Mr. Skull suggests a skull
if you don't already have one...
mahdi:
muahahahaha
To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it probably goes back to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad.
Lenore
Lenore VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
zombiehead2:
aaaarrrrgggghhh!! oh wait, never mind...i just thought i saw a scary clown, but it was only my brother walking into the room...i wonder why he's holding that big knife...
kimmi:
Clowns are evil. I shall protect you from clowns. Hehehe.
I am a weirdo. Yes..yes I am.
I am a weirdo. Yes..yes I am.
Sometimes I wish some people would just fuck RIGHT off.
Lenore
Lenore VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
trilobyte:
Amen to that. I wish that were a super-power. Like forget heat vision or being bulletproof, I want to be able to make people fuck off (either on command, or with some kind of gesture or I Dream Of Jeannie move...).
And Mr. Skull sends his love...
And Mr. Skull sends his love...
pmvirgin:
But if people fucked RIGHT off, then everyone would get stuck going LEFT...
[Edited on Mar 17, 2003]