VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
lorelei:
aker:
it's to bad you don't have a pic of a T-rex that would be sweet
Sooo, boys and girls, how are you all doing? I hope that life is bringing you nothing but the best of luck...if not, then I suppose that the time is not yet right.
We must all face trials of the heart and mind before we are conditioned to fully appreciate love and happiness. Only then can we care for love as we should, when we...
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We must all face trials of the heart and mind before we are conditioned to fully appreciate love and happiness. Only then can we care for love as we should, when we...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
paulnikon:
Hmmm. There always seemed to be plenty of jobs in San Diego. Good luck.
tigerangel:
If he is certain about wanting this, and you seem to desire to live with him, take the chance. You'll never know unless you try (cliche, I know). Sometimes we have to take the next step even though we don't know where it might lead and what the consequences might be.
Oh, and out of curiousity, did you shoot the photo set WITH Lorelei or was she your photographer? Cuz it would be awesome to see you do a set with her. Oh, and big resounding YES: your breasts ARE magnificent!!
Oh, and out of curiousity, did you shoot the photo set WITH Lorelei or was she your photographer? Cuz it would be awesome to see you do a set with her. Oh, and big resounding YES: your breasts ARE magnificent!!
Fucking dog shit.
I feel like I've potentially ruined everything.
Last night, my darling and I were making love. It was fantastic, and I was on the cusp of dying from my overwhelming bliss.
For whatever reason, my mind reverted back to my rape. Nothing my lover did sparked this, but it was there nonetheless. Maybe it was the dark surrounding us, for other than...
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I feel like I've potentially ruined everything.
Last night, my darling and I were making love. It was fantastic, and I was on the cusp of dying from my overwhelming bliss.
For whatever reason, my mind reverted back to my rape. Nothing my lover did sparked this, but it was there nonetheless. Maybe it was the dark surrounding us, for other than...
Read More
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
doublec:
i don't know you but the sweet TigerAngel said you were having a tough time and now i see what she meant!
i'm sure you didn't ruin anything...how could you control what you were feeling...strong emotions and feelings good or bad have to come out whether we want them to or not...i'm sure he'll understand and come to realize that it had nothing to do with him...hang in there *hugs*
i'm sure you didn't ruin anything...how could you control what you were feeling...strong emotions and feelings good or bad have to come out whether we want them to or not...i'm sure he'll understand and come to realize that it had nothing to do with him...hang in there *hugs*
leprechaunman:
We all still love you Calypso! I am sure he can understand what you are going through. He loves you and will be there with you to fight it off.
Mother's Day.
Fuck this fuckin' holiday.
Yes, it's great for happy mommies, but I'm not too fond of it, myself.
Eight days ago I had the potential to be a mommy. I would have become a mommy around Christmastime. Today was not a good day for me, knowing this.
My mother is also three thousand miles away. I miss her terribly, despite all the trash-talking...
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Fuck this fuckin' holiday.
Yes, it's great for happy mommies, but I'm not too fond of it, myself.
Eight days ago I had the potential to be a mommy. I would have become a mommy around Christmastime. Today was not a good day for me, knowing this.
My mother is also three thousand miles away. I miss her terribly, despite all the trash-talking...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
punkndrublic:
things will work out for you sweetie.
love ya. keep your head up
love ya. keep your head up
tigerangel:
OMG, honey, I don't know how i missed this entry.
sweet jesus, you were raped and you've never had the chance to talk about it with your mom. oh darling, i am so sorry. fuck, i don't know what else to say.....
i know you are feeling shitty about what you had to go through 2 weekends past, but it will eventually get better. not to say that you will forget, but you will start to not think about it everyday. in a couple of weeks, it'll be the 4th anniversay for me. it is so hard to believe that i could have had a 3-year-old clinging to me right now. very hard to fathom. but you'll soon come to terms with it and realize that it was for the best. i know that it doesn't make it hurt less now, but it WILL get better, i swear. and if the ease of your experience was any indication, i'm sure you'll be able to bear children in the future. nothing seemed to go wrong, so i don't think you have to worry about that.
again, i am sorry for all that you've gone through. *lots of hugs* but things will be better in the future. you have to believe that or else it'll destroy you. the future is all we have--and it is the only thing that we the power to shape. the horrible past is unfortunately not something we can fix, but if you surround yourself with love TODAY, you have the chance of having a wonderful future. always remember that. you deserve nothing less than love.
[Edited on May 14, 2005 6:57AM]
sweet jesus, you were raped and you've never had the chance to talk about it with your mom. oh darling, i am so sorry. fuck, i don't know what else to say.....
i know you are feeling shitty about what you had to go through 2 weekends past, but it will eventually get better. not to say that you will forget, but you will start to not think about it everyday. in a couple of weeks, it'll be the 4th anniversay for me. it is so hard to believe that i could have had a 3-year-old clinging to me right now. very hard to fathom. but you'll soon come to terms with it and realize that it was for the best. i know that it doesn't make it hurt less now, but it WILL get better, i swear. and if the ease of your experience was any indication, i'm sure you'll be able to bear children in the future. nothing seemed to go wrong, so i don't think you have to worry about that.
again, i am sorry for all that you've gone through. *lots of hugs* but things will be better in the future. you have to believe that or else it'll destroy you. the future is all we have--and it is the only thing that we the power to shape. the horrible past is unfortunately not something we can fix, but if you surround yourself with love TODAY, you have the chance of having a wonderful future. always remember that. you deserve nothing less than love.
[Edited on May 14, 2005 6:57AM]
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
candy:
ive never ridden a quad before, but i did eat shit on a dirtbike and knocked out my front teeth! that shit hurt, so i can relate..
kristy_lyn:
i hope you're doing ok
*hugs*
and
*kisses*
*hugs*
and
*kisses*
I went through with the abortion yesterday. Let me give you a run-down of everything that happened.
Friday night I got into a little spat with my sweetheart. He wanted to sleep, whilst I wanted a little love and reassurance due to my state of emotional instability. He didn't really want to say anything reassuring, because he felt like it'd be bullshit because I'm asking...
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Friday night I got into a little spat with my sweetheart. He wanted to sleep, whilst I wanted a little love and reassurance due to my state of emotional instability. He didn't really want to say anything reassuring, because he felt like it'd be bullshit because I'm asking...
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VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
bettina:
Wow, what an amazing story! Thank you for sharing.
joshuaamos:
I'm sorry you had to go thru that...
I had the moment today. The defining moment where everything comes down to one amazing realization. The kind that comes out of nowhere and leaves you wondering what the fuck just happened.
I laid there on my side, half-conscious and in naught but a blanket. He had moved the blanket in such a way that left my entire back and shoulders exposed. He oh-so-lightly ran...
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I laid there on my side, half-conscious and in naught but a blanket. He had moved the blanket in such a way that left my entire back and shoulders exposed. He oh-so-lightly ran...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
solithan:
I'm happy and sad for you all in one.
huny:
wow that made me cry
I have been where you are
I have been where you are
Dear Embryo,
Forgive me for what I must do.
For less than two weeks have I known of your presence, but just as you have attached yourself to me, I have become attached to you.
I want to be able to see your face. I want to hold you in my arms and let you suckle at my breast. I want to be your mother,...
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Forgive me for what I must do.
For less than two weeks have I known of your presence, but just as you have attached yourself to me, I have become attached to you.
I want to be able to see your face. I want to hold you in my arms and let you suckle at my breast. I want to be your mother,...
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VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
audient:
I am amazed.
brinny:
thank you.... that is all i can say...
"I love you," he whispered into my ear and kissed my cheek as I was half-asleep.
Reeling, I lay there on my side, in silence and joyful shock.
My eyes still closed, I heard the door shut as he left the room.
Wow, I thought. No way did he just say that...
I had wanted to say it back...I wanted to throw my arms...
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Reeling, I lay there on my side, in silence and joyful shock.
My eyes still closed, I heard the door shut as he left the room.
Wow, I thought. No way did he just say that...
I had wanted to say it back...I wanted to throw my arms...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
judyisapunk:
I agree with what you said about love 100%. I've been with Eternalfor three years, and in college the whole time. My friends ask me all the time why I would want to have a long distence relationship when there are so many opertunities right here. And my answer is always the same, because I love him and don't want anyone else. Follw your heart, it never leads you wrong
vuokko:
Hey, lady. Hadn't heard from you in a while. Thought I'd stop by to say hello. Lovely journal entry!
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
postmodernsleaze:
ur not the only 1-----
i've had 2 and it was simply bcuz i'm an idiot and dammit i am fertile fucking myrtle!!
my grandma used 2 say she could get pregnant standing next 2 a dude well thanx cuz i seem 2 b the same way!!!!!
i've had 2 and it was simply bcuz i'm an idiot and dammit i am fertile fucking myrtle!!
my grandma used 2 say she could get pregnant standing next 2 a dude well thanx cuz i seem 2 b the same way!!!!!
marge:
I have one of those chilling in a coffee mug on my desk that I use to hold pens. Interestingly enough the mug says "cyber slut." Keep yours in a public place, it's a great conversation starter. "Uhhhhh, is that what I think it is?"
On the less amusing side, my "procedure" fucked me up for life. I know the offers are already out there, but if you need to vent about it at all, I'm here to listen.
On the less amusing side, my "procedure" fucked me up for life. I know the offers are already out there, but if you need to vent about it at all, I'm here to listen.
I'm so enthralled by all that he is.
"Unimaginable," I used to scoff at the idea of someone like him existing.
He gets my jokes, my Will Ferrell quotes, my movies references...
I felt an overwhelming tenderness towards him when I woke up beside him Saturday morning. A feeling of "I need nothing but this," and I nearly gasped at my own thought process.
So...
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"Unimaginable," I used to scoff at the idea of someone like him existing.
He gets my jokes, my Will Ferrell quotes, my movies references...
I felt an overwhelming tenderness towards him when I woke up beside him Saturday morning. A feeling of "I need nothing but this," and I nearly gasped at my own thought process.
So...
Read More
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
tigerangel:
dammit, lady, quit putting yourself down with these doubts! he sounds wonderful...let yourself enjoy that. if you keeping wondering why you deserve him, he's gonna start wondering the same thing. you deserve to have someone amazing like that--every girl does. and he sounds like he deserves an awesome gal like you. those doubts and self-recriminations will just doom you--and there is no need for them.
You are wonderful. Start believing that.
You are wonderful. Start believing that.
wallace:
and girl, it sounds like you & i are in the same boat with this boy thing. i thing we both need to realize that we are just awesome people who deserve the good company of these gentlemen, and for good things to happen to us.
and girl, it sounds like you & i are in the same boat with this boy thing. i thing we both need to realize that we are just awesome people who deserve the good company of these gentlemen, and for good things to happen to us.
Ah, finally I had a night to talk about...
Yet, I don't know if I should...
Let's just say it was wonderful.
Soft kisses, warm skin, everything I've needed for so long...
No sleep. Hours of talking, then long, enraptured love-making.
Perhaps it was the duration of our verbality (yes, it's a word) that set the stage for my ever-mounting desire to touch and be...
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Yet, I don't know if I should...
Let's just say it was wonderful.
Soft kisses, warm skin, everything I've needed for so long...
No sleep. Hours of talking, then long, enraptured love-making.
Perhaps it was the duration of our verbality (yes, it's a word) that set the stage for my ever-mounting desire to touch and be...
Read More
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
arcade:
Just enjoy it, don't worry about what might happen. Have a good weekend at the ren fest.
~ que cera cera ~
~ que cera cera ~
rocketx:
oh god, now i missed the Renaissance Faire...