Shitty mood. Long story. Best to save only the minor details: Chasing after women is hard work, upkeep is hard work, and longing and dreaming after the fabeled gem called love is even more work. It doesn't help the effect of anti depressants when the work turns to turmoil. Fruitless, that's what it is. Anyways, yeah.I am just energized enough from the numerious mini naps I have taken, to write this. Then, back to napping.
The point is, after all the plans I made with a girl I thought was super cute, all to be dashed and thrown out the window, I really put to much focus and effort into girl chasing so much that every let down hits me harder than it should, as hard as a breakup, and there was never even a date so technically that makes no sense. But hell, apparently I'm an emotional guy, I have very unique outlooks on life, and I am beginning to regret leaving my confort zone, my shell, my computer life..... to pursue life itself, to chase women to the ends of the earth, or go broke trying. It's one of the many things I have found lately that I can't find a reason to fight for.
As my attempt at joining the real world fails once again, are there any tips anyone has on beating depression? Already took xanax and zoloft, now I take 3 Zoloft a day and see a psychologist weekly for evaluation..... I don't smoke and I rarely drink, so I am running out of anti-depression mechanisms. At least boobs on the computer don't take much work, and hardly ever leave me disappointed. Yay for SG!
Well that put a small smile on my face, briefly. night.
Edit: I don't think it helps my situation that Alaska is burning and I can smell smoke but no BBQ. Makes me wanna puke.
The point is, after all the plans I made with a girl I thought was super cute, all to be dashed and thrown out the window, I really put to much focus and effort into girl chasing so much that every let down hits me harder than it should, as hard as a breakup, and there was never even a date so technically that makes no sense. But hell, apparently I'm an emotional guy, I have very unique outlooks on life, and I am beginning to regret leaving my confort zone, my shell, my computer life..... to pursue life itself, to chase women to the ends of the earth, or go broke trying. It's one of the many things I have found lately that I can't find a reason to fight for.
As my attempt at joining the real world fails once again, are there any tips anyone has on beating depression? Already took xanax and zoloft, now I take 3 Zoloft a day and see a psychologist weekly for evaluation..... I don't smoke and I rarely drink, so I am running out of anti-depression mechanisms. At least boobs on the computer don't take much work, and hardly ever leave me disappointed. Yay for SG!
Well that put a small smile on my face, briefly. night.
Edit: I don't think it helps my situation that Alaska is burning and I can smell smoke but no BBQ. Makes me wanna puke.
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and it helps. honest to god. your mileage may vary, but it really does help me. i'm not saying go try writing a song or anything like that - it works for me because music has always been my home base, it's always been there for me when i needed something to do or something to take my mind off things. so music may not be your thing, but something out there revs your engine. i know there's something, everybody has something whether they realize it or not.
maybe it's not a creative thing for you, though from what i've seen mostly these things tend to be. and, i dunno, maybe you already have your thing and maybe doing it doesn't help you as much as it does me. i'm not sure.
just thought it was worth mentioning.